So there it is. The old. Thats all there is so from now on everything will be NEW.
I hope you take time to read through those and comment them.
I love to hear what im doin wrong.
So soon ill start new stuff.
Hope you all like this stuff..... so im not just wastin time lol
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
lay down your arms [june09]
Boppin down the street i see your self righteous 'tude
i know your shit dont stink but it makes you so rude
its painted on your face and its in your eyes
while you use your words to put on a disguise
and you use your beliefs like bridges, crossed, burnt, they crumble and fall
stick to your guns or use none at all
maybe ill finish this someday. lol
i know your shit dont stink but it makes you so rude
its painted on your face and its in your eyes
while you use your words to put on a disguise
and you use your beliefs like bridges, crossed, burnt, they crumble and fall
stick to your guns or use none at all
maybe ill finish this someday. lol
Dustin;s Lullaby [june 09]
to rest i gift you a Mjölner
smacking your head just like my thunder
breaking foundation to protect your home
fighting the giants who invade your skull
electric death for those who stay and fight
i do not rest at night
music to my ears, the death of your enemies
lighting the night sky to show the whites of their eyes
i will not rest till you rest alright
i cannot sleep till you live at peace
he stands above me ready for your attack
so powerful you cannot imagine
not a cut but a blunt painful death
can you invade our lives today?
and maybe escape with your lives/
when you see the goats know there will be blood
they are after you, dont even try to run
restored without broken bones, they signal your death.
cracked earth and volcanic fire
raining down like the storms rain and thunder
music to my ears, the death of my enemies
lighting the night sky to show the whites of their eyes
i will not rest till you kill them all
i cannot sleep till their blood does fall
i grow from the ground, my mother i am born over again
my son has the strength to crush them as well
but i defeat in serpentine, have never seen a dragon
and i am this planet grounded not rested in the black sky.
smacking your head just like my thunder
breaking foundation to protect your home
fighting the giants who invade your skull
electric death for those who stay and fight
i do not rest at night
music to my ears, the death of your enemies
lighting the night sky to show the whites of their eyes
i will not rest till you rest alright
i cannot sleep till you live at peace
he stands above me ready for your attack
so powerful you cannot imagine
not a cut but a blunt painful death
can you invade our lives today?
and maybe escape with your lives/
when you see the goats know there will be blood
they are after you, dont even try to run
restored without broken bones, they signal your death.
cracked earth and volcanic fire
raining down like the storms rain and thunder
music to my ears, the death of my enemies
lighting the night sky to show the whites of their eyes
i will not rest till you kill them all
i cannot sleep till their blood does fall
i grow from the ground, my mother i am born over again
my son has the strength to crush them as well
but i defeat in serpentine, have never seen a dragon
and i am this planet grounded not rested in the black sky.
Half lies, half aphrodisiac [june09]
Look at you
look at you run run run
finding a place to hide
a building for safety
finding a savior to love
a man to protect you
and now its on its way to get you
the beast you cant run from
not even hidden in that kindergarten building
with a man teaching fairytales
the beast has smelled your blood and it wants some more
no telepathic words can make it go away
this is no storybook character
this is no horror film star
a hunter we all know of
a hunter you cant run from
the walls you think bring safety it owns them all
the man you think will save you it burns him down
and thousands gather to watch the burning it holds for us all
you cannot hide from the beast, as poor as you are
you cannot hide from the beast, in the times we are part
the beast on the hunt knows you dont believe
attacking it with everything you got.
your crushed sanctuary
your charcoal savior
theyve let you down time after time
and when the world gets its has on you
it will eat you alive
look at you run run run
finding a place to hide
a building for safety
finding a savior to love
a man to protect you
and now its on its way to get you
the beast you cant run from
not even hidden in that kindergarten building
with a man teaching fairytales
the beast has smelled your blood and it wants some more
no telepathic words can make it go away
this is no storybook character
this is no horror film star
a hunter we all know of
a hunter you cant run from
the walls you think bring safety it owns them all
the man you think will save you it burns him down
and thousands gather to watch the burning it holds for us all
you cannot hide from the beast, as poor as you are
you cannot hide from the beast, in the times we are part
the beast on the hunt knows you dont believe
attacking it with everything you got.
your crushed sanctuary
your charcoal savior
theyve let you down time after time
and when the world gets its has on you
it will eat you alive
Verruckt! [june 09]
I remember the days of the closed minded
no windows
no floor
just 6 walls
no doors
and a cage you would rest in
begging for food when all they gave was a knife.
such head games but this is no puzzle
there is no life outside
your cage suspended in time
everything is behind you and you cant turn around
look now! what, how?!
a broken cage on the floor
you escaped out the window, they entered through the door
ecstasy it feels like with the sun on your skin
speed it feels like running through the wind
heroin it feels like with deep deep breathes
cocaine it is because your hungry for more
till the meth hits and youre down on the floor
and the weed fails to pick you up so you just smoke more.
as they race towards you, hatchets in hands
you are saved without a prayer in your head
through all youve done youve come out just fine
with stiff veins that cannot be broken
youd never make it out
youd never see the light
youd never feel the touch
youd be down to rot with the poison you chose.
now out
searching for more
for those youve never done
for those that got you hooked
its crazy the hold it has
not to be broken
not to be stolen/
no windows
no floor
just 6 walls
no doors
and a cage you would rest in
begging for food when all they gave was a knife.
such head games but this is no puzzle
there is no life outside
your cage suspended in time
everything is behind you and you cant turn around
look now! what, how?!
a broken cage on the floor
you escaped out the window, they entered through the door
ecstasy it feels like with the sun on your skin
speed it feels like running through the wind
heroin it feels like with deep deep breathes
cocaine it is because your hungry for more
till the meth hits and youre down on the floor
and the weed fails to pick you up so you just smoke more.
as they race towards you, hatchets in hands
you are saved without a prayer in your head
through all youve done youve come out just fine
with stiff veins that cannot be broken
youd never make it out
youd never see the light
youd never feel the touch
youd be down to rot with the poison you chose.
now out
searching for more
for those youve never done
for those that got you hooked
its crazy the hold it has
not to be broken
not to be stolen/
i cannot fly, but if the time is right, ill gladly try. [June09]
here i stand on this roof in my birthday suit
painted up with shining red and white
here i look down 13 stories to you looking below
if i could fly i would swoop down and bring you along
and i would bring out wax wings so toward the sun we belong
falling down doesnt hurt even when we hit the ground
there are not problems up so high.
with the impact of fat man you slam my face
a curbstomped face smiling endlessly, i can never get away
the fights you bring me, suckerpunched till im numb
the daily brawls i go through, the purest form of fun
so marigold is there enough fun to thrive?
or will it hide so you do nothing but dive?
when home runs away you got quite some job to do
you cant live without your home, can you?
when home wanders away give chase
you will parish in these streets, burn out like the rest.
with the impact of little boy i leave death behind
a torch in my path, i will stay away
the home i will find, to catch i must run
home fled the house, there can be only one.
naked on the rooftop, have you ever
let everyone see the true you?
do you pile on your lies like you live in the ice.
leave it all behind, or else paradise has a price
a price and a detour back to a place you wont like
painted up with shining red and white
here i look down 13 stories to you looking below
if i could fly i would swoop down and bring you along
and i would bring out wax wings so toward the sun we belong
falling down doesnt hurt even when we hit the ground
there are not problems up so high.
with the impact of fat man you slam my face
a curbstomped face smiling endlessly, i can never get away
the fights you bring me, suckerpunched till im numb
the daily brawls i go through, the purest form of fun
so marigold is there enough fun to thrive?
or will it hide so you do nothing but dive?
when home runs away you got quite some job to do
you cant live without your home, can you?
when home wanders away give chase
you will parish in these streets, burn out like the rest.
with the impact of little boy i leave death behind
a torch in my path, i will stay away
the home i will find, to catch i must run
home fled the house, there can be only one.
naked on the rooftop, have you ever
let everyone see the true you?
do you pile on your lies like you live in the ice.
leave it all behind, or else paradise has a price
a price and a detour back to a place you wont like
In the worst way possible [june 09]
to you a kiss goodbye
not from lips from the arm to an eye
to you a life of contempt
away from here in a place to lie
scratching away at the matter inside
tearing out the emotion ive learned to hide
tucked away from a family example
come forth to help it all die
its times like these that let hatred thrive.
so your ways arent true at all
the waves you swim will let you fall
and dragging down those around
i wish you were alone in the water wall
minds as cold as ice will not die
but we carry icepicks to jam inside
im glad your here to dispense for my fries
dont get mad when here is where i leave you to lie.
dont let your reach get to us, come play with us
for red walls were always what i wanted, dont infect the unwanted
it wont hurt long, the pain lasts as long as the problem
but the problem is you, youll be hurtin forever.
dont try to inflict with your mental games
lets see how well you think when your head hits the pavement
when the bat hits the cranium
when the air hits your brain again.
breathe deep it might have to last an eternity
but dont run because youll only die tired
and burning is no fun when your out of breathe
because you may try to go up to be kicked back down
the reason they gave was a sell outs death.
burn out and fade away
so none of us have to see your face
lay your weapons down because your guns arent stuck
but your rich as fuck because of all you sold
life gave you friends and you ate the shit, gold!
with a wire around your neck your lungs wont last
and with your hands on the cross your chest cant expand
but was this whole charade just part of your plan?
if you drag us down not even dental records will show
the log in the stream, dropped by a ufo.
not from lips from the arm to an eye
to you a life of contempt
away from here in a place to lie
scratching away at the matter inside
tearing out the emotion ive learned to hide
tucked away from a family example
come forth to help it all die
its times like these that let hatred thrive.
so your ways arent true at all
the waves you swim will let you fall
and dragging down those around
i wish you were alone in the water wall
minds as cold as ice will not die
but we carry icepicks to jam inside
im glad your here to dispense for my fries
dont get mad when here is where i leave you to lie.
dont let your reach get to us, come play with us
for red walls were always what i wanted, dont infect the unwanted
it wont hurt long, the pain lasts as long as the problem
but the problem is you, youll be hurtin forever.
dont try to inflict with your mental games
lets see how well you think when your head hits the pavement
when the bat hits the cranium
when the air hits your brain again.
breathe deep it might have to last an eternity
but dont run because youll only die tired
and burning is no fun when your out of breathe
because you may try to go up to be kicked back down
the reason they gave was a sell outs death.
burn out and fade away
so none of us have to see your face
lay your weapons down because your guns arent stuck
but your rich as fuck because of all you sold
life gave you friends and you ate the shit, gold!
with a wire around your neck your lungs wont last
and with your hands on the cross your chest cant expand
but was this whole charade just part of your plan?
if you drag us down not even dental records will show
the log in the stream, dropped by a ufo.
From Afar [May 09]
From afar he looks happy he looks glad
but you cant quite imagine the trouble hes had
fram afar he says little, obeserving everything
taking notes on everything, and searching for an amphetamine
from afar he wont tell you what it is
theres hatred and love that have come to this
from afar he looks smart, looks happy
but the labrynth of his soul you cant see
From afar.
now up close you see the shattered pane of glass
you see the hatred that would have lasted
and the mountain he once scaled
along with the blood he left in trails
all the hatred he doesnt wish you shared
now up close, we get a little scared
now in reverse the past is fine
there was never a place for him to dine
never a sky for him to fall from
or false hope to instill in new trust
and she never slept without him in that bed
and never fucked up and told the lies she said
and they never strayed from his loyal embrace
and he never did any of those drugs those days
and she never left and lied to his face
and he never fucked up waht he thought was grace
and his friends never left so fast
and he never spend all of that useless cash
for everyone thougth that he would last
and he never tried to leave everyone so fast
except this all did happen... in the past
we dont let it repeat iself, dont even ask
little of it remains, and friends have changed
the past is rougth waters but it stays the same
and somehow he learned to swim, and he beat the game.
but you cant quite imagine the trouble hes had
fram afar he says little, obeserving everything
taking notes on everything, and searching for an amphetamine
from afar he wont tell you what it is
theres hatred and love that have come to this
from afar he looks smart, looks happy
but the labrynth of his soul you cant see
From afar.
now up close you see the shattered pane of glass
you see the hatred that would have lasted
and the mountain he once scaled
along with the blood he left in trails
all the hatred he doesnt wish you shared
now up close, we get a little scared
now in reverse the past is fine
there was never a place for him to dine
never a sky for him to fall from
or false hope to instill in new trust
and she never slept without him in that bed
and never fucked up and told the lies she said
and they never strayed from his loyal embrace
and he never did any of those drugs those days
and she never left and lied to his face
and he never fucked up waht he thought was grace
and his friends never left so fast
and he never spend all of that useless cash
for everyone thougth that he would last
and he never tried to leave everyone so fast
except this all did happen... in the past
we dont let it repeat iself, dont even ask
little of it remains, and friends have changed
the past is rougth waters but it stays the same
and somehow he learned to swim, and he beat the game.
Painfully fun, enjoyably rough [may 09]
heavy breathing, lungs aching
bodies numb and bones shaking
the adrenaline that feeds the need for a good time
gives the energy it take to enjoy the ride
and you rememver your first time when you couldn't stay up
but look now what you can do when your passion turned to love from lust
now youve been at it for hours and your knees feel weak
your breathing is intesne, you think your elbows might break
but determination is the reason you have what it takes
hours on end run by like seconds
reluctantly you break but not for a minute
with everyone around it can add to excitement
until you fall out, right down on your face again
safety concerns come second priority
with means of having fun coming as the majority
with 2 maybe 3 of us all down on this town
when we break it down, theres not more fun to be found
down right dirty we all are today
but back breaking labor is the price we pay
nothing gets blood pumping like sticking the landing
with some screaming & scratching & very little padding
we get so high and it lasts through the climax
we live for this, releasing our power.
now you stop and think, damn look what we've done
that was some tricky shit, a movie could have been made
we got some pain but in the name of fun
a feel good trip, puts afrodisiacs to shame
but not to beat the sweat and rush game
20 inches of pure love feeding your veins
you proved you have what it takes to out last the game
and come tomorrow night, it will all be the same
bodies numb and bones shaking
the adrenaline that feeds the need for a good time
gives the energy it take to enjoy the ride
and you rememver your first time when you couldn't stay up
but look now what you can do when your passion turned to love from lust
now youve been at it for hours and your knees feel weak
your breathing is intesne, you think your elbows might break
but determination is the reason you have what it takes
hours on end run by like seconds
reluctantly you break but not for a minute
with everyone around it can add to excitement
until you fall out, right down on your face again
safety concerns come second priority
with means of having fun coming as the majority
with 2 maybe 3 of us all down on this town
when we break it down, theres not more fun to be found
down right dirty we all are today
but back breaking labor is the price we pay
nothing gets blood pumping like sticking the landing
with some screaming & scratching & very little padding
we get so high and it lasts through the climax
we live for this, releasing our power.
now you stop and think, damn look what we've done
that was some tricky shit, a movie could have been made
we got some pain but in the name of fun
a feel good trip, puts afrodisiacs to shame
but not to beat the sweat and rush game
20 inches of pure love feeding your veins
you proved you have what it takes to out last the game
and come tomorrow night, it will all be the same
This one is free MAY 09
Well....here we are....
the four year long party is over.....
and here we go... off to the jungle
but we know our way...
tarzan and jane.
this was all we've known
the hallways and classrooms
the rumors the drama
the friends the fights
and all the burned out lights.
this town was not so kind
taking more than a few lives.
but it feels right to make it out
even though i have learned to love this town
i dont know what else to say
even if there were no friends i still sort of want to say
but its not my place. dead ends dont make for stories too great.
this is were we go.
all friends go different ways... thank god for internet and cell phones.
the aquaintances you hate to leave, the friends you cant stand to forget
it becomes hard to stay in contact, but with a mission in life it can be possible.
there were times i would look at them, living feet away...
and wish to be like them, wish to be the same
theres something special over there, just a few feet away
but now i feel i have it, without hesitation i will say.
ive seen times alone in homes, comfortable as can be
and i know that for a while... that will be you and me.
here we go out of town, to leave all the demons,
to return again for food, at the celebration of the seasons.
but now we sit so comfy in this room, busy bees workin to get out
only 7 days before time runs out.
pretty soon the light goes out.
these are times i cant live without.
weve worked so hard it seems too long.
now time to relax and listen to the songs...
to you all who will be gone,
friends one and all.... you knwow how to contact me, i will miss you all.
in the end these days make us....us... mistakes and fate, control our lives
everything i treasure, the good, the bad, the love, the lies
it all helps mature someone, if they can even make it.
to the future we will go. ready to leave the prison world
never will we feel the same, we will tell these stories some day.
ive run out of words about the day.
that everyone you know.... will go a seperate way.....
the four year long party is over.....
and here we go... off to the jungle
but we know our way...
tarzan and jane.
this was all we've known
the hallways and classrooms
the rumors the drama
the friends the fights
and all the burned out lights.
this town was not so kind
taking more than a few lives.
but it feels right to make it out
even though i have learned to love this town
i dont know what else to say
even if there were no friends i still sort of want to say
but its not my place. dead ends dont make for stories too great.
this is were we go.
all friends go different ways... thank god for internet and cell phones.
the aquaintances you hate to leave, the friends you cant stand to forget
it becomes hard to stay in contact, but with a mission in life it can be possible.
there were times i would look at them, living feet away...
and wish to be like them, wish to be the same
theres something special over there, just a few feet away
but now i feel i have it, without hesitation i will say.
ive seen times alone in homes, comfortable as can be
and i know that for a while... that will be you and me.
here we go out of town, to leave all the demons,
to return again for food, at the celebration of the seasons.
but now we sit so comfy in this room, busy bees workin to get out
only 7 days before time runs out.
pretty soon the light goes out.
these are times i cant live without.
weve worked so hard it seems too long.
now time to relax and listen to the songs...
to you all who will be gone,
friends one and all.... you knwow how to contact me, i will miss you all.
in the end these days make us....us... mistakes and fate, control our lives
everything i treasure, the good, the bad, the love, the lies
it all helps mature someone, if they can even make it.
to the future we will go. ready to leave the prison world
never will we feel the same, we will tell these stories some day.
ive run out of words about the day.
that everyone you know.... will go a seperate way.....
The future killers [may 09]
he sits and waits in the back of the class
so soon they will bust in to take him away
with bloody fingers and a gun in his hands
the blood that is smeared all over, his words
and a gun, with an itchy trigger finger ready to blow
all the blood will stain, cannot be washed
its all ugly and scattered
eveyone around lays on the floor....shattered
its more than just stains, its the blood from his brain, the blood frm his veins/
and now he sits and he waits, for the storm to come
but all of the rain can wash away the blood
all of the pain, liquid, caused by the fun
the blood runs down, and onto the ground
now burned in his eyes, its on the walls and the halls.
these surfaces are his steaks on which he paints
barbeque sauce on walls in waves, just to reduce the pain
as it all drips down forming pictures from his mind
many little expressions strewn out in a line
now the room is filled with pain
the pain of his and the people he has slain
now there he sits, with an empty gun, dripping with blood
then he ditches the weapon, cleans up and runs.
before the authoriies get there to stop his later fun....
so soon they will bust in to take him away
with bloody fingers and a gun in his hands
the blood that is smeared all over, his words
and a gun, with an itchy trigger finger ready to blow
all the blood will stain, cannot be washed
its all ugly and scattered
eveyone around lays on the floor....shattered
its more than just stains, its the blood from his brain, the blood frm his veins/
and now he sits and he waits, for the storm to come
but all of the rain can wash away the blood
all of the pain, liquid, caused by the fun
the blood runs down, and onto the ground
now burned in his eyes, its on the walls and the halls.
these surfaces are his steaks on which he paints
barbeque sauce on walls in waves, just to reduce the pain
as it all drips down forming pictures from his mind
many little expressions strewn out in a line
now the room is filled with pain
the pain of his and the people he has slain
now there he sits, with an empty gun, dripping with blood
then he ditches the weapon, cleans up and runs.
before the authoriies get there to stop his later fun....
So fake so pretty [may 09]
I see you round and about and you seem to be that way
but i find it hard to believe those words you say
i know enough about it to believe it doesnt pay
bug you pretend to act, though you dont in any way
i know you shouldnt do it, and you know so too
but the ones who lie about their beliefs, are just the same as you
you look around and see those eyes, they know you play him for a fool
and if you thought you would know, you know he knows you do
if youre gunna do it, at least do it right
he wouldnt like the tools you use to that fill you with strife?
but we know you do the thinkgs you do, only for them
the things you know he hates, you love them anyway
so why even fake commitment, you are just the same
do you even know the beliefs you claim?
do you believe the words you say?
can you even read the truths you claim?
do you even know his name?
youre a half hearted follower fro that set you claim
i may not believe it, at least i dont lie for the fame
i dont try to fake it life you, i accept my way
and so do they.
but this is me and unlike you i will not fake
evenif i end up with fire and pain]
but i find it hard to believe those words you say
i know enough about it to believe it doesnt pay
bug you pretend to act, though you dont in any way
i know you shouldnt do it, and you know so too
but the ones who lie about their beliefs, are just the same as you
you look around and see those eyes, they know you play him for a fool
and if you thought you would know, you know he knows you do
if youre gunna do it, at least do it right
he wouldnt like the tools you use to that fill you with strife?
but we know you do the thinkgs you do, only for them
the things you know he hates, you love them anyway
so why even fake commitment, you are just the same
do you even know the beliefs you claim?
do you believe the words you say?
can you even read the truths you claim?
do you even know his name?
youre a half hearted follower fro that set you claim
i may not believe it, at least i dont lie for the fame
i dont try to fake it life you, i accept my way
and so do they.
but this is me and unlike you i will not fake
evenif i end up with fire and pain]
How to take a life [may09]
oh honey you worry your pretty little head
concerning yourself with the problems youve fed
upset over the lies you continously bled
but we know you lied to us for the best
and we know youre still the victim in life
ive tried to help you but i cant this time
cuz youre the only one thats hurt, thats right
dont worry about everyone around, we're fine
because we siut back and discuss your life
but your the victim, caused by your lies
i know this hurt you and youre so broke up
to think your 99 problems dont add up to one
the worlds out to get you, for your sins youre being tried
but step back and think about it hun...
who just died?
and seconds later tell me now
who just died?
and think long and hard about it
how will you survive?
now everyone knows what youre about
they sit and laugh and write it around town
but they are high in your head and wont come down
but how can you live? god is after you now?
though you let me down i will help you out
because you dig yourself some holes all about
with some hurdles you set p get over them soon
because you waste away killing yourself to those songs
with bullets from your brain, its such bad news
but your the victim still, you took all my wounds
have fun with those, just steer clear of the salt
the wprlds attacking you, and your hurt, youre it all
im sure you got alot of problems
and you hope to be fine
but you worry too much
and look... you just died.
Stop Me if im lyin [may 09]
perception, the lies, seeing the disguise
deception, denies, breaking all the ties
for once in your life, believe the words they save
once in a while, you find the ones who want to stay
its in fate and in karma, that things just get better
and its that time in your life, you stop hating the first letter
take a walk in the night, back in time to the fight
when the drugs and the love of the worst kind ruled your life
when everyone looked past a burnout, downtown, down on his luck
he was looking down on the burnouts scattered all over the town
but he was high up busy with killing himself, too busy to come down
though he could look around he never saw the safety net
then he would be used for free, a fool, a pet
she came down to help him out? or just to get a free ticket around
he never knew better, believed it all along,
at one point thought he was happy, but was dead wrong
she got a new bud, he knew him already
she tried to play it off, claimed it was just a mistake
she didnt know how right she was, dropped out where she couldnt follow
mistakently upset he found comfort in that bottle
still up hihg on his tight rope walking, high above the shattered ground
but he still could not see the safety net all around.
and one day he jumped, fell from that rope
holding onto what he had, holding onto the hope
but puppetmaster says you cannot come down
this life is not only yours, you have more comin around
he knew the bullshit, its not a babies day,
so he lept with the rest, in hopes to be saved
too bad he found a hole in that net, wide open, woven friends had made
but what would you expect when those titles are fake
go save a life he heard, its in you to try
because it was a very sad sight, i could see him die
the pulls put him down and the others force him up
killin himself this way just wasnt enough
he wont last long he is near the end of his fall
now he falls through the clouds, and what he can see is the ground
falling faster than the rain around, but he is calm for now
one hundred more feet, he can smell the trees, soon he can possibly feel the grass on his feet
seconds later, face to the ground, living, breathing, feeling
with a broken neck though he cannot look around
eyes set on a river, to wash away his pain
with the rain rushing down, he crawls down for a life to save
i look down on him to see his ways
and before he knows it he is free of pain
shattered from the fall they will need to save his places
a savior arrives to pick of the peices
a savior that fell with a line cut safety net, to join him for this reason
but he learned to save a life, he wont regret a thing
as he lays there in the rain, he realizes, "it"s big.
Fall Together [aprile 09]
boy oh boy what a life we live
we fight together against the pains of life
and when i think of the troubles of the world at night
i come down to the reality that is alright
reality eats you alive, but mine is just fine.
give me another hit to take me away
im stuck here wondering why they had to die
worrying about troubles i have to face, and i dont want to stay
i just need you to take me higher, my trust is here
dont drop me off halfway, i want to be taken there
its now an addiction because i need it to survive
its an emfatuation because i want it there till i die
and i used to see other versions of me and think they were crazy
but i realize i am there, it happened so fast, and its blasphemy
one taste, i was hooked, but i always have enough money to get my fix,
and everytime i get my hit, im smashed with new trips.
Is it illegal if i need it? more like survival at this point
i would not die without it, but it makes like worth living,
you know the feeling, when it shakes the joint.
the greatest lesson of them all, to carry throughout your life
get hooked on the drug of your choice, it there for you to find
but dont rush these things, cuz you want to be hooked for life
the most important thing you will ever do before you die.
and on your way out, shout loud,
we all have a voice and if we dont let it out, we are just another face in the crowd
and stay true to your voice and your drugs, the only things sure to never let you down.
we fight together against the pains of life
and when i think of the troubles of the world at night
i come down to the reality that is alright
reality eats you alive, but mine is just fine.
give me another hit to take me away
im stuck here wondering why they had to die
worrying about troubles i have to face, and i dont want to stay
i just need you to take me higher, my trust is here
dont drop me off halfway, i want to be taken there
its now an addiction because i need it to survive
its an emfatuation because i want it there till i die
and i used to see other versions of me and think they were crazy
but i realize i am there, it happened so fast, and its blasphemy
one taste, i was hooked, but i always have enough money to get my fix,
and everytime i get my hit, im smashed with new trips.
Is it illegal if i need it? more like survival at this point
i would not die without it, but it makes like worth living,
you know the feeling, when it shakes the joint.
the greatest lesson of them all, to carry throughout your life
get hooked on the drug of your choice, it there for you to find
but dont rush these things, cuz you want to be hooked for life
the most important thing you will ever do before you die.
and on your way out, shout loud,
we all have a voice and if we dont let it out, we are just another face in the crowd
and stay true to your voice and your drugs, the only things sure to never let you down.
Lets Talk [April09]
My dearest friend(s)
ive come here in the toughest of times
to tell you you've fucked up again.
the reality show your hosting
is getting old so fast, and its showing
youre no ryan seacrest, youre meant for game shows
except you play along, and win prizes all along
id love to say your my best friend
but i know youve let me down once again.
i asked you for a favor and you could not comply
and in the end, my trust would die.
i caught your hand in the cookie jar
and i knew the whole time you were never far.
but now your dying, and i dont care
and i know you believe in hell, i might see you there.
youre as fake as they come, do you remember the beliefs you claimed?
thrown them out like the drugs you play.
your inscrutable motives have led us astray
so here are the words everyone was afraid to say:
fuck you, you dipshit, please go suffocate.
the problem is i wouldnt help you,
not even to asphyxiate.
ive come here in the toughest of times
to tell you you've fucked up again.
the reality show your hosting
is getting old so fast, and its showing
youre no ryan seacrest, youre meant for game shows
except you play along, and win prizes all along
id love to say your my best friend
but i know youve let me down once again.
i asked you for a favor and you could not comply
and in the end, my trust would die.
i caught your hand in the cookie jar
and i knew the whole time you were never far.
but now your dying, and i dont care
and i know you believe in hell, i might see you there.
youre as fake as they come, do you remember the beliefs you claimed?
thrown them out like the drugs you play.
your inscrutable motives have led us astray
so here are the words everyone was afraid to say:
fuck you, you dipshit, please go suffocate.
the problem is i wouldnt help you,
not even to asphyxiate.
Our Lives Like Pokemon Cards (trade mine for yours) APR09
I miss you, and all our games
because i let youm give me a name
because i helped you, though you never gave
I never asked, you never had, what i could give
the impression of what truely is,
importance, in its purest form
and you tell me, you forgot this wasnt the norm
but you were so very colse to me
i was the family, she would never be
from the same place, we both ran here
we thought we'd end it, and we never feared
you had changed me more than anyone before
but nothing is left, you are great Kingsbury lore,
from the streets you came, to the home i gave
to when you finally went off, gone for your own
now the fun was ours, it was always around
we made the funnest times, in the lamest town
we went through the girls,we went through the schools
we went through policemen, we went through it all
your opinions were wise, especially on love and the fall
we were there when you found your one
but id find mine, you'd be gone
[c]
never one to hate, you were always so grateful
and as we all know the parties bring the assholes
i was supposed to be backup, i was supposed to be smart
but it slipped through my fingers, like the water on a knife
the blurriest of visions, almost black and white
but only on ething was clear, and colored so bright
shortly after the shock, i held in my hands
the one thing to most, that is the most important to man
but the most important to this one, was clueless in bed.
not knowing of life taking, not knowing of life giving
many hours later drunken fun was now dead
now hit with a hurricane, i thought i'd never swim again.
[c]
I want you to rest assured, all the money it took, we made
to the place you wanted to go, a wish that we gave
and the question you never asked, got asked along the way
the promises made, i will keep, in any way
i had no idea, the impace on that man
ill be sure to tell you later, every word you said
the next time i see you again, in Jeffery Jordan Ashlan,
because i let youm give me a name
because i helped you, though you never gave
I never asked, you never had, what i could give
the impression of what truely is,
importance, in its purest form
and you tell me, you forgot this wasnt the norm
but you were so very colse to me
i was the family, she would never be
from the same place, we both ran here
we thought we'd end it, and we never feared
you had changed me more than anyone before
but nothing is left, you are great Kingsbury lore,
from the streets you came, to the home i gave
to when you finally went off, gone for your own
now the fun was ours, it was always around
we made the funnest times, in the lamest town
we went through the girls,we went through the schools
we went through policemen, we went through it all
your opinions were wise, especially on love and the fall
we were there when you found your one
but id find mine, you'd be gone
[c]
never one to hate, you were always so grateful
and as we all know the parties bring the assholes
i was supposed to be backup, i was supposed to be smart
but it slipped through my fingers, like the water on a knife
the blurriest of visions, almost black and white
but only on ething was clear, and colored so bright
shortly after the shock, i held in my hands
the one thing to most, that is the most important to man
but the most important to this one, was clueless in bed.
not knowing of life taking, not knowing of life giving
many hours later drunken fun was now dead
now hit with a hurricane, i thought i'd never swim again.
[c]
I want you to rest assured, all the money it took, we made
to the place you wanted to go, a wish that we gave
and the question you never asked, got asked along the way
the promises made, i will keep, in any way
i had no idea, the impace on that man
ill be sure to tell you later, every word you said
the next time i see you again, in Jeffery Jordan Ashlan,
Lets go? [march09]
Sound on, higher to drown
because the running and running
can ruin many nights
and make the morning that much tougher
insomnia is my lover, that i will never let go, i said
even my double homicide could not take your life.
drugs leave me on the ground, not even jump height
but the sound on would help me take flight.
an addiction to kill, i will not let go
i need the sound to juice me to fantasy
without it im stuck in the hell-reality
not even metaphors such as these could save my face.
sleep walking above my nightmares
because as long as i got the sound i dont need to come down.
but when the world hits you back
you are forced to get back on track
just what i needed, everything to kick my ass
so now i got a new addiction
gold to my brain, i cant get enough to sufice
with all my might i pull it into my life
and get high every chance i get
turn the sound off and now the running slows to a walk
eveythings so slow, and i havent been back to reality in weeks.
back in the days i would never sleep,
now in a way i will never wake.
or never sleep again, your perspective will tell
and i will never come down so dont even try
i dont care if it kills me , im staying up here now
try to come get me, i will throw you down.
this is my cloud, rain cant bring it down.
because the running and running
can ruin many nights
and make the morning that much tougher
insomnia is my lover, that i will never let go, i said
even my double homicide could not take your life.
drugs leave me on the ground, not even jump height
but the sound on would help me take flight.
an addiction to kill, i will not let go
i need the sound to juice me to fantasy
without it im stuck in the hell-reality
not even metaphors such as these could save my face.
sleep walking above my nightmares
because as long as i got the sound i dont need to come down.
but when the world hits you back
you are forced to get back on track
just what i needed, everything to kick my ass
so now i got a new addiction
gold to my brain, i cant get enough to sufice
with all my might i pull it into my life
and get high every chance i get
turn the sound off and now the running slows to a walk
eveythings so slow, and i havent been back to reality in weeks.
back in the days i would never sleep,
now in a way i will never wake.
or never sleep again, your perspective will tell
and i will never come down so dont even try
i dont care if it kills me , im staying up here now
try to come get me, i will throw you down.
this is my cloud, rain cant bring it down.
The Rapist {march 09}
please come into my office, and sit down
if you would like some candy there is plenty around
right here is the bed, in which you will stay
im here to help, and until im done you wont get away
so lets break the ice, if you want you can have a drink
and as we go along, for what to do next, i may have to think
dont worry this wont take too long
but if it does you will be sure to pay before youre gone
ill take away your problems by just doing my thing
and if it is necessary, you wont remember a thing
i will kill for you, we can be a team
but i have one promise to make, it will be painless,no need to scream.
hey there, im lost, can you help me get out of here?
thank you your so kind, you say there's candy in there?
so that is the bed or a chouch its all the same
you know im really not sure how long i can stay
thank you for the drink, it is very strong
im gettin kinda tipsy so lets go along
im kinda having second thoughts, im not very comfortable
oh i can tell im gunna pay, i can see this is trouble
if it will help this, make it so i dont remember
i will think of it as just another day in november
i dont want to share with you, im afraid i must run
;or i guess i could stay, just dont force me with that gun
but now its all over, and at this point, less pain
and the rapist gets away, because his victims are in my brain.
if you would like some candy there is plenty around
right here is the bed, in which you will stay
im here to help, and until im done you wont get away
so lets break the ice, if you want you can have a drink
and as we go along, for what to do next, i may have to think
dont worry this wont take too long
but if it does you will be sure to pay before youre gone
ill take away your problems by just doing my thing
and if it is necessary, you wont remember a thing
i will kill for you, we can be a team
but i have one promise to make, it will be painless,no need to scream.
hey there, im lost, can you help me get out of here?
thank you your so kind, you say there's candy in there?
so that is the bed or a chouch its all the same
you know im really not sure how long i can stay
thank you for the drink, it is very strong
im gettin kinda tipsy so lets go along
im kinda having second thoughts, im not very comfortable
oh i can tell im gunna pay, i can see this is trouble
if it will help this, make it so i dont remember
i will think of it as just another day in november
i dont want to share with you, im afraid i must run
;or i guess i could stay, just dont force me with that gun
but now its all over, and at this point, less pain
and the rapist gets away, because his victims are in my brain.
Tired [march 09]
h the sound
breaking darkness
killing fantasies
attacking with reality
a snooze button does not exist
and i would not hit it if it did
eyes open, get out of bed
the noise resting quitely where i lay my head
did i even sleep? because i saw no nightmares
it has been quite some time since they have been here
and when i start to sink, and fall towards those dreams
the noise sounds agai, to save me from that sea
man down, but not overboard, a life raft already around my neck
i could be asleep in the water and let the fish steal from worms
because nobody will accept the flowers i would make
ive never wanted to wake up so early
till i was hit with such an alarm
to make the day start before the light comes on
but seperate days so clearly so we dont lose our lives
cause yesterday was oh so long
too long to call a year, more like half a life
but a half dead sleep walk just to get by
walking through a nightmare the devil would create
but today is its ying, and i wathc the nightmares die
the first day of spring, and i feel angels cry
the clock that awakens me, controls the time
faster or slower i will not know which it decides
becasuse the puzzle of time seems to go fast when noone wants
;if time could stand still, nobody would cry
we need to turn months into years, just so we can survive]
breaking darkness
killing fantasies
attacking with reality
a snooze button does not exist
and i would not hit it if it did
eyes open, get out of bed
the noise resting quitely where i lay my head
did i even sleep? because i saw no nightmares
it has been quite some time since they have been here
and when i start to sink, and fall towards those dreams
the noise sounds agai, to save me from that sea
man down, but not overboard, a life raft already around my neck
i could be asleep in the water and let the fish steal from worms
because nobody will accept the flowers i would make
ive never wanted to wake up so early
till i was hit with such an alarm
to make the day start before the light comes on
but seperate days so clearly so we dont lose our lives
cause yesterday was oh so long
too long to call a year, more like half a life
but a half dead sleep walk just to get by
walking through a nightmare the devil would create
but today is its ying, and i wathc the nightmares die
the first day of spring, and i feel angels cry
the clock that awakens me, controls the time
faster or slower i will not know which it decides
becasuse the puzzle of time seems to go fast when noone wants
;if time could stand still, nobody would cry
we need to turn months into years, just so we can survive]
Missin my rage [march o9]
you are your words
your nothings, their gold
their game, you fold
your wisdom, youre old
your words are the life rafts
to everyone lost at sea
and for those the dehydrated
water is what your pen bleeds
and your scriptures have the tools
to give them what they need
from the highest and the low
you have the medals to show
everything is yours to mold
brains and hearts, yours to hold
[c]
It seems your ideals have been rejected
but to affect is to be affected
and as such your knocked on a course to crash
down into a padded room, with an addiction you never knew you had
now they all call you a psyco
they hand you the lable of a schizo
so that you and your better half
will get credit for the let go
though youre both insane and mad.
maybe you really are insane
or you just learned to play the game.
[c]
but in the days of discontent
your personalities would fight to vent
but now they learn to live as one
because they are not complete alone
but in the days of not love but war
you tried the first, but everyone got bored
and im going to go ahead and guess
that the only words thatt came out of your mouth,
were the only ones that you truely belived in
...but nobody believed them
two are, but one
youre perfect, youre gold
you live, you learned
youre wisdom, is love.
your nothings, their gold
their game, you fold
your wisdom, youre old
your words are the life rafts
to everyone lost at sea
and for those the dehydrated
water is what your pen bleeds
and your scriptures have the tools
to give them what they need
from the highest and the low
you have the medals to show
everything is yours to mold
brains and hearts, yours to hold
[c]
It seems your ideals have been rejected
but to affect is to be affected
and as such your knocked on a course to crash
down into a padded room, with an addiction you never knew you had
now they all call you a psyco
they hand you the lable of a schizo
so that you and your better half
will get credit for the let go
though youre both insane and mad.
maybe you really are insane
or you just learned to play the game.
[c]
but in the days of discontent
your personalities would fight to vent
but now they learn to live as one
because they are not complete alone
but in the days of not love but war
you tried the first, but everyone got bored
and im going to go ahead and guess
that the only words thatt came out of your mouth,
were the only ones that you truely belived in
...but nobody believed them
two are, but one
youre perfect, youre gold
you live, you learned
youre wisdom, is love.
One day [march 09]
One day
we all might live as one
one day
we all might lose the sun
and that day
we might be able to forget
and some way
we can ignore all the things we left
because we are wasting our time
letting our problems control our lives
and we all see they dont matter now
but why cant we seem to put them down
people are wrong, and in reality, the same
but you still seem content when your filled with hate
but those ones dont matter as much
as the ones you love
and the only truth in this world is, nothing really does
if we are here for a reason, we will find there is none at all
and we may just find out we exist to stop the fall
nothing in the world matters as much as the ones you love
our episodes, our differences, should only make us stronger
we exist to live, to love the ones we trust
trust is golden, trust is not lost, but thrown away
and trust between the some of us, was not saved
trust is what you have from me, trust is what you gave
and everything that i have, is nothing to everyone else
because this place turned its back on us
a cold shoulder to freeze a burning passion
its time to get out, lets get out
and when people learn to teach themselves
only then will they be okay
to learn that trust and love
cannot be thrown around like do so much now;
do they really know?
they dont even ask the questions,
because they dont even know;
to learn they are not in complete control
and they just need to let go
the past is now lost
it is not to be lived in, but learned from;
the past is just the future with the lights on
and we all need to be afraid of the dark;
Your world is not a planet
your world is a state of mind
it is built and maintained by the ones you love
your world is your heart and it does not float
there are gentle hands to hold, remember now, the majority
they too hold the hourglass of your life
and they do not waste your time
time is an important thing we have
as important as the hands that hold,
the things they hold,
without them, nothing else is possible
and without love, we are:
we all might live as one
one day
we all might lose the sun
and that day
we might be able to forget
and some way
we can ignore all the things we left
because we are wasting our time
letting our problems control our lives
and we all see they dont matter now
but why cant we seem to put them down
people are wrong, and in reality, the same
but you still seem content when your filled with hate
but those ones dont matter as much
as the ones you love
and the only truth in this world is, nothing really does
if we are here for a reason, we will find there is none at all
and we may just find out we exist to stop the fall
nothing in the world matters as much as the ones you love
our episodes, our differences, should only make us stronger
we exist to live, to love the ones we trust
trust is golden, trust is not lost, but thrown away
and trust between the some of us, was not saved
trust is what you have from me, trust is what you gave
and everything that i have, is nothing to everyone else
because this place turned its back on us
a cold shoulder to freeze a burning passion
its time to get out, lets get out
and when people learn to teach themselves
only then will they be okay
to learn that trust and love
cannot be thrown around like do so much now;
do they really know?
they dont even ask the questions,
because they dont even know;
to learn they are not in complete control
and they just need to let go
the past is now lost
it is not to be lived in, but learned from;
the past is just the future with the lights on
and we all need to be afraid of the dark;
Your world is not a planet
your world is a state of mind
it is built and maintained by the ones you love
your world is your heart and it does not float
there are gentle hands to hold, remember now, the majority
they too hold the hourglass of your life
and they do not waste your time
time is an important thing we have
as important as the hands that hold,
the things they hold,
without them, nothing else is possible
and without love, we are:
Forever war FEB09
a war is set to rage
on earth and inthe sky
the fighters from the ground
will not leave their home
so the warriors from above
will bring the fight to their land
attack from the heavens
thor couldnt be more proud
the righteous men come down
pawns of the gods, they do as they are told
for a battle that must be won
the charlies on the ground,
they own everything around
but the righteoys men will rise
and take back what was theirs
kamakazees from the sky
to kill the oppression,, though they will die
thousands of men who die on the ground
making a wonderful, bonecrushing sound
the tangos armed with hands of depression
dont stand a chance, out numbered a million to one
the battle rages on, and many men do die
but the victors in this war, come from the sky
they wipe away our enemies, which makes them our friends
because they never stop fighting till theyve won
the take what they want, which is why they come
and as they turn towards us, sights set on destruction
one of which only they will know, because we destroy them with our touch
but theyre suicidal cries only ring out in vane
we lock and stand together, we let them try to take,
but in the end we won the war
the sky cried for what it was fighting for
but accomplished what we could not
and vanquished an enemy to which we had lost
and though they died and left,
their bodies lay across the land
these warriors, come from the sky
we will always remember why they died
they leave the smell of a battle won
too many enemies, crushed down to none
and though that enemy will be back around
we can only hope the warriors come save our town
because without them it is lost, and surely doomed
the enemy will destroy us, too
but that is then and this is now
looking out at the bodies strewn around
of the saviors, come from the sky
you and i both know, why they died.
on earth and inthe sky
the fighters from the ground
will not leave their home
so the warriors from above
will bring the fight to their land
attack from the heavens
thor couldnt be more proud
the righteous men come down
pawns of the gods, they do as they are told
for a battle that must be won
the charlies on the ground,
they own everything around
but the righteoys men will rise
and take back what was theirs
kamakazees from the sky
to kill the oppression,, though they will die
thousands of men who die on the ground
making a wonderful, bonecrushing sound
the tangos armed with hands of depression
dont stand a chance, out numbered a million to one
the battle rages on, and many men do die
but the victors in this war, come from the sky
they wipe away our enemies, which makes them our friends
because they never stop fighting till theyve won
the take what they want, which is why they come
and as they turn towards us, sights set on destruction
one of which only they will know, because we destroy them with our touch
but theyre suicidal cries only ring out in vane
we lock and stand together, we let them try to take,
but in the end we won the war
the sky cried for what it was fighting for
but accomplished what we could not
and vanquished an enemy to which we had lost
and though they died and left,
their bodies lay across the land
these warriors, come from the sky
we will always remember why they died
they leave the smell of a battle won
too many enemies, crushed down to none
and though that enemy will be back around
we can only hope the warriors come save our town
because without them it is lost, and surely doomed
the enemy will destroy us, too
but that is then and this is now
looking out at the bodies strewn around
of the saviors, come from the sky
you and i both know, why they died.
Aye, Dean Cain [feb 09]
Dear Diary
you own all my secrets
to use them as you please
i trust you will keep them safest
because your hard bound cover has no flaws
a beautifuly scripted first page
and an amazing book to follow
full of empty pages because i could not find the words
but i hold the key to write as i please
and you give relief as much as you take from me
pages fill fast, and your there to save me
Dear Diary
with a secret inside
there for me to see, looked past for so long
ive given you all i have
because its still the same beautiful cover i trust
but filled with written pages ive chosen to read
now i am as smart as can be
and for sure you now see the real me,
from an entry titled february seventeenth
and ill say it again, how you saved me
and how i owe you, one galaxy
with eyes wide open ive found heaven
in your pages, now i dont need to sleep again
eyes wude ioen, is where they will stay
because there arent enough words for me to say
to my diary, turned neverending story.
you own all my secrets
to use them as you please
i trust you will keep them safest
because your hard bound cover has no flaws
a beautifuly scripted first page
and an amazing book to follow
full of empty pages because i could not find the words
but i hold the key to write as i please
and you give relief as much as you take from me
pages fill fast, and your there to save me
Dear Diary
with a secret inside
there for me to see, looked past for so long
ive given you all i have
because its still the same beautiful cover i trust
but filled with written pages ive chosen to read
now i am as smart as can be
and for sure you now see the real me,
from an entry titled february seventeenth
and ill say it again, how you saved me
and how i owe you, one galaxy
with eyes wide open ive found heaven
in your pages, now i dont need to sleep again
eyes wude ioen, is where they will stay
because there arent enough words for me to say
to my diary, turned neverending story.
you v me [feb 09]
for the last time
i will watch you fall in line
for the last time
you will hear that wind chime
the brewed storm moved on with the times
its amazing how weve managed to survive
crawling out of the lowest valley, deep
surrounded by nothing but murderuous heat
when death is a pleasure to us all
when the next sound could make us fall
deeper than ever, with your back against the wall
beg for forgiveness, do you have a god to save you?
or have you seen through the lies?
and if heaven isnt a place on earth
why dont you die, if you belong in the sky?
karma is who she is, and sometimes her horses get lost
but when she makes it you will be saved at any cost
for the last time
you will deal with that shit
you wont have to deal with the lies they spit
because unfaithful is not the new way
greatness is all you got today
you: now have gotten paid
reperations for the foundation laid
for your sins; atoned
you, my friend, will never be alone
oh enemy of mine, why dont you go?
everything you could, you gave
and been regifted all the same
when someone up above has let you down
you must look in front of you reyes
your key to happiness, has always been around.
i will watch you fall in line
for the last time
you will hear that wind chime
the brewed storm moved on with the times
its amazing how weve managed to survive
crawling out of the lowest valley, deep
surrounded by nothing but murderuous heat
when death is a pleasure to us all
when the next sound could make us fall
deeper than ever, with your back against the wall
beg for forgiveness, do you have a god to save you?
or have you seen through the lies?
and if heaven isnt a place on earth
why dont you die, if you belong in the sky?
karma is who she is, and sometimes her horses get lost
but when she makes it you will be saved at any cost
for the last time
you will deal with that shit
you wont have to deal with the lies they spit
because unfaithful is not the new way
greatness is all you got today
you: now have gotten paid
reperations for the foundation laid
for your sins; atoned
you, my friend, will never be alone
oh enemy of mine, why dont you go?
everything you could, you gave
and been regifted all the same
when someone up above has let you down
you must look in front of you reyes
your key to happiness, has always been around.
Goodbye high school? [FEB 17!}
[ac]
Darkness welcomes light
a song to sing in the night
two voices mend to one
do we take this time and run?
cuz if i could make time stand still
i will not go, tis my will
and when the youngest eyes are blind
they open up in time to see the sky
and let the memories be nice
and let the lessons learned suffice
enough for dwelling on the past
now the perfect mind will last
ive never seen time go so slow
but it was over before i know
but now it seems we've grown so old
the past; just legends that we told
how do we make the good times last
when they rush by us so damn fast
four years are shorter than one
and dont you know we've had our fun
for sure the best is yet to come
we cut our losses and make our run
how did we miss this is where we'd come?
before our eyes, it was strung
the ends justify the means
cuz in the end happy is all we'll be
un the past we cannot stay
we are living in today
these times will be the best
ive got one greater than the rest
cuz four years blend to one hundred
now we've got what we wanted
[/ac]
<1>
And i, couldnt be happier
<2>
Those werent the best times of my life
too many stories heard were lies
<1>
bring on the best of time, for our lives
<2>
Do you believe where we've come?
<1>
I should have seen it all along.
<2>
Do you believe the rest will be fun?
<1>
I have faith, that this is...fuck.
Darkness welcomes light
a song to sing in the night
two voices mend to one
do we take this time and run?
cuz if i could make time stand still
i will not go, tis my will
and when the youngest eyes are blind
they open up in time to see the sky
and let the memories be nice
and let the lessons learned suffice
enough for dwelling on the past
now the perfect mind will last
ive never seen time go so slow
but it was over before i know
but now it seems we've grown so old
the past; just legends that we told
how do we make the good times last
when they rush by us so damn fast
four years are shorter than one
and dont you know we've had our fun
for sure the best is yet to come
we cut our losses and make our run
how did we miss this is where we'd come?
before our eyes, it was strung
the ends justify the means
cuz in the end happy is all we'll be
un the past we cannot stay
we are living in today
these times will be the best
ive got one greater than the rest
cuz four years blend to one hundred
now we've got what we wanted
[/ac]
<1>
And i, couldnt be happier
<2>
Those werent the best times of my life
too many stories heard were lies
<1>
bring on the best of time, for our lives
<2>
Do you believe where we've come?
<1>
I should have seen it all along.
<2>
Do you believe the rest will be fun?
<1>
I have faith, that this is...fuck.
New writing project to finish
so high above the world and i will never come down
a bounce in my step as i float around town
and a smile in my face cuz im stuck in the clouds
happy as ever, theres a shrowd around.
im astounded at what ive found
whats begining to seem like a gift sent down
hits like a bludgeon to my crown
sending me to the ground
...faster than the speed of sound.
im just a kid that learned of the air...
and how it is always everywhere
but i could not see it there
a bounce in my step as i float around town
and a smile in my face cuz im stuck in the clouds
happy as ever, theres a shrowd around.
im astounded at what ive found
whats begining to seem like a gift sent down
hits like a bludgeon to my crown
sending me to the ground
...faster than the speed of sound.
im just a kid that learned of the air...
and how it is always everywhere
but i could not see it there
Flogging Acoustic [feb 09]
When there's problems you can't solve
and you need just to relax
don't let your heart dissolve
let the place just come back
, come back
i was happy the whole damn time
and i believe every fucking lie
and the disease, your a bitch in disguise
and this betrayal only helps my demise
when the problems wont go away
and good times are here to stay
do you need to feel okay?
smoking away,
smoking awaay,
a stick of cancer smelling of sweetness
dont you know that ive already beat this?
dont blame me for your fucking weakness
just run off and spread the shit that you want
but they all know your a lying cunt
you need to learn to prioritze
before you end up alone when you die
you;ve only got one life to live
so why not throw it all away?
no matter what you do, you cant stay
so life just seems like a waaste,
smoking away,
smoking awaay,
just another walk in the park today
i cant believe what you just had to say
so what, i lied just to get away,
away?
from all the shit i dont want to see
theres not an ounce of patience left in me
so just remember what you did, when im gone
and that you did this, feeling miserable
idea to stay here all along
driven away in my mind, takin ex to fall,
and i am,
blowing away
all that you say,
a method to spray
all the memories away,
im too happy to stay here
so set this -place- ablaze
smoking away
smoke it away,
and take all that ive known
the place once called home
a place to never return
throw it away,
before i go insane,
and you need just to relax
don't let your heart dissolve
let the place just come back
, come back
i was happy the whole damn time
and i believe every fucking lie
and the disease, your a bitch in disguise
and this betrayal only helps my demise
when the problems wont go away
and good times are here to stay
do you need to feel okay?
smoking away,
smoking awaay,
a stick of cancer smelling of sweetness
dont you know that ive already beat this?
dont blame me for your fucking weakness
just run off and spread the shit that you want
but they all know your a lying cunt
you need to learn to prioritze
before you end up alone when you die
you;ve only got one life to live
so why not throw it all away?
no matter what you do, you cant stay
so life just seems like a waaste,
smoking away,
smoking awaay,
just another walk in the park today
i cant believe what you just had to say
so what, i lied just to get away,
away?
from all the shit i dont want to see
theres not an ounce of patience left in me
so just remember what you did, when im gone
and that you did this, feeling miserable
idea to stay here all along
driven away in my mind, takin ex to fall,
and i am,
blowing away
all that you say,
a method to spray
all the memories away,
im too happy to stay here
so set this -place- ablaze
smoking away
smoke it away,
and take all that ive known
the place once called home
a place to never return
throw it away,
before i go insane,
turkey sandwich (feb 09)
used was never how i was meant to be
only here to feel the pain of the world
to care and to help those i believe
to get broken again and again
with a chest made of salt
you know it burns greater than ever
despite the love i feel
giving so much without anything in return,
is not enough to keep me going
blinded by the greatest thing
pouring out, and left here to burn
id do it all again, you deserve the best
im sorry i let you down, it falls on me
if i had my way
the greatest memories of you and me,
would be here to stay
its worth all the struggles
risk and reward is just my way
it seems like your afraid to take a risk
but you too will get a reward
if i am known for one thing,
its my passion to make the ones i love
the happiest ones of all
maybe ill set out to sea
because i cant get away
you are every face on tv
and girl in a song
and they all haunt me
and with more balance today
i would not fall,
a long pondered leap of faith
the toughest decision to be made
without a single ounce of haste
could end up killing my brain
however brings no regrets to name
these smokes no longer help
and my pens are all out of blood
attempting to leave my mark on the world
a waste of time and space,
im meant to be forgotten
"im not screaming these words out for nothing now"
one of many recurring lines
on a scrolling marquee in my mind
whats an addiction but a major infliction
increasing my extinction
giving meaning to my existence?
tell me, just how ludicrous is this?
if there was a god in heaven,
he wouldnt pull so hard on the strings
hope for a good time after,
splattered like brain matter on the inside of my car
the tip of the iceberg,
the story you know,
is melting in the light of the sun
rising for the first time
from the clouds of ruin
my faults and falls
are my pleasure to indulge.
only here to feel the pain of the world
to care and to help those i believe
to get broken again and again
with a chest made of salt
you know it burns greater than ever
despite the love i feel
giving so much without anything in return,
is not enough to keep me going
blinded by the greatest thing
pouring out, and left here to burn
id do it all again, you deserve the best
im sorry i let you down, it falls on me
if i had my way
the greatest memories of you and me,
would be here to stay
its worth all the struggles
risk and reward is just my way
it seems like your afraid to take a risk
but you too will get a reward
if i am known for one thing,
its my passion to make the ones i love
the happiest ones of all
maybe ill set out to sea
because i cant get away
you are every face on tv
and girl in a song
and they all haunt me
and with more balance today
i would not fall,
a long pondered leap of faith
the toughest decision to be made
without a single ounce of haste
could end up killing my brain
however brings no regrets to name
these smokes no longer help
and my pens are all out of blood
attempting to leave my mark on the world
a waste of time and space,
im meant to be forgotten
"im not screaming these words out for nothing now"
one of many recurring lines
on a scrolling marquee in my mind
whats an addiction but a major infliction
increasing my extinction
giving meaning to my existence?
tell me, just how ludicrous is this?
if there was a god in heaven,
he wouldnt pull so hard on the strings
hope for a good time after,
splattered like brain matter on the inside of my car
the tip of the iceberg,
the story you know,
is melting in the light of the sun
rising for the first time
from the clouds of ruin
my faults and falls
are my pleasure to indulge.
Cult fiction [feb09]
shatter sentimental beings in the street,
with a silence so deafening
and the vision of the thousand memories
strewn around the scene
they glint in the sunlight
dont look back, its a sad sight
whats worse, death or purgatory?
when you life in hell, are both right?
why do you wear that stupid man suit?
would you remove it if you could?
i swore to keep my mouth shut
but its known that i shouldnt
you were wrong, i forsaw it
now take the time you need, admit it
broken and miserable?
jaded and crused?
perfect and stressed
this is where i need to be
it ripped and tore me
now my heart is gone
there's nothing but bloddstains and bitemarks
im not high anymore, limbo as hell, for good reason
but i couldnt be happier
its the perfect season
i gave you the dream i once had
shard a life that was no longer bad
but you used it, and used it hard
but id do it all again, at the next beat of my heart
never to come again, thanks for the art
when my pen bleeds, all can read my brain
head and soul filled with pain
set to the tune of happiness, in a town of the insane
i know you wont miss me when im gone
three thousand miles is not all that far eh?
dont hesitate to write, cuz id love to feel the same
open arms to the night sky
the stars spell out hope in its code
with a silence so deafening
and the vision of the thousand memories
strewn around the scene
they glint in the sunlight
dont look back, its a sad sight
whats worse, death or purgatory?
when you life in hell, are both right?
why do you wear that stupid man suit?
would you remove it if you could?
i swore to keep my mouth shut
but its known that i shouldnt
you were wrong, i forsaw it
now take the time you need, admit it
broken and miserable?
jaded and crused?
perfect and stressed
this is where i need to be
it ripped and tore me
now my heart is gone
there's nothing but bloddstains and bitemarks
im not high anymore, limbo as hell, for good reason
but i couldnt be happier
its the perfect season
i gave you the dream i once had
shard a life that was no longer bad
but you used it, and used it hard
but id do it all again, at the next beat of my heart
never to come again, thanks for the art
when my pen bleeds, all can read my brain
head and soul filled with pain
set to the tune of happiness, in a town of the insane
i know you wont miss me when im gone
three thousand miles is not all that far eh?
dont hesitate to write, cuz id love to feel the same
open arms to the night sky
the stars spell out hope in its code
never repair, never return ]JAN 08[
poisoned veins only numbs the pain
the problem persists, and i know what it is
gimme a drink? where does that get me?
this smoke helps neither, this is where i want to be
so this is it, where it hits me
but i know what you don't, i know where it goes
gimme the chill, alright is the future
When you talk, i get my ass kicked
your words are right, comin like a hook out of sight
and i eat 'em, fed like the lies
alright, you can borrow my ride
just get it back in one peice, stitch up the sides
and dont be offended if i find the urge to lie
its just to help me get high
forever, is a place and a time
now and me, at least till i want to die
and dont worry cuz i got what i need
and here, i got you this, but its not from me.
poisoned veins only numbs the pain
the problem persists, and i know what it is
gimme a drink? where does that get me?
this smoke helps neither, this is where i want to be
so this is it, where it hits me
but i know what you don't, i know where it goes
gimme the chill, alright is the future
I dont believe the truth so feed me the lies
crush and destroy is the battle cry
cuz you get out, as fast as you can
i see why, cuz hell is where you live
and the host, knows just what hell is
dark, scary, a little bit ugly
nothing can save it, must, we blow it up
erase the existence, cuz heavens not there
why should hell be? how is that fair?
let the host burn, he is no good for earth
let him rest in hell, he was damned from birth
Seperate reigns, just more pain
the problem persists, the host iswhat it is
now let him sink, thats where he should be
air, the fire feeder, kill him to save me
and thats just is, kill him to kill me
cuz i know what you dont, death is for me
gimme a pill, i have no future.
the problem persists, and i know what it is
gimme a drink? where does that get me?
this smoke helps neither, this is where i want to be
so this is it, where it hits me
but i know what you don't, i know where it goes
gimme the chill, alright is the future
When you talk, i get my ass kicked
your words are right, comin like a hook out of sight
and i eat 'em, fed like the lies
alright, you can borrow my ride
just get it back in one peice, stitch up the sides
and dont be offended if i find the urge to lie
its just to help me get high
forever, is a place and a time
now and me, at least till i want to die
and dont worry cuz i got what i need
and here, i got you this, but its not from me.
poisoned veins only numbs the pain
the problem persists, and i know what it is
gimme a drink? where does that get me?
this smoke helps neither, this is where i want to be
so this is it, where it hits me
but i know what you don't, i know where it goes
gimme the chill, alright is the future
I dont believe the truth so feed me the lies
crush and destroy is the battle cry
cuz you get out, as fast as you can
i see why, cuz hell is where you live
and the host, knows just what hell is
dark, scary, a little bit ugly
nothing can save it, must, we blow it up
erase the existence, cuz heavens not there
why should hell be? how is that fair?
let the host burn, he is no good for earth
let him rest in hell, he was damned from birth
Seperate reigns, just more pain
the problem persists, the host iswhat it is
now let him sink, thats where he should be
air, the fire feeder, kill him to save me
and thats just is, kill him to kill me
cuz i know what you dont, death is for me
gimme a pill, i have no future.
Religion?? [JAN 09]
Who am i?
just a useless, fuck up kind of guy
night walker, sky watcher
catch me any night
out and about, wandering around
rockin' the orange and brown
loggin' miles on my body
makin' markes on this town
with a black hangin' out my mouth
leavin' a trail of blood,
the bad brain matter, makin' dead meat
honey, im a different breed
a craving for stress
pressure on my brain
something i like to test
and an inclination to give the best
i know it all, and seldom get to rest
[c]
when your mind is hard at work
does your body get to play?
when the pills you take dont work
does it seem worth it to stay?
cause ive been through the miles
seen through disguises
and the city never lies,
so here is where i'll die.
[..c]
you dont know what i know
cause in the night, everything shows
you're see through like these shop windows
and still more miles to go
cant rest till i reach perfection, the goal
a figure in the dark, yeah, thats it
a superhero that cant save shit
thats me, jaded, evaded
by good memories worth savin'
a fuck up, a scum bag
a dash of luck and i end up as a cum rag
i shouldn't be here
hot wheels serve a better purpose
instead go get a happy meal
that's a better service
[c]
a little bitter? yeah, why not?
life is peachy, till your best friend gets caught
rollin' round in /your/ bed
tryin' to lie and claim he's /your/ friend
and a bitch tryin' to fake belief in trust
a victim of lust? fuck, you had a plan
conniving little cunt and i saw it, damn
but could say i'm mad? naw I thank you much
it's the same story for all of you
scars are just a lesson learned
so why waste my time with school?
like it, i learn from your actions, and both are a waste
and it hits quick, high, not confused, not preterbed
i somewhat welcome death, cause hell can't be worse
now your gone, i can't be happier
you've been replaced, couldn't have been any better
and out on the streets, i find my home
and i see memories, in the places i roam
if i dont make it back to that house
it's cause i got priorities,
sleep doesnt make the list
life is peachy, lovely, as long as i got these feet to move me
but i get greedy, my savior is going to kill me
[c]
just a useless, fuck up kind of guy
night walker, sky watcher
catch me any night
out and about, wandering around
rockin' the orange and brown
loggin' miles on my body
makin' markes on this town
with a black hangin' out my mouth
leavin' a trail of blood,
the bad brain matter, makin' dead meat
honey, im a different breed
a craving for stress
pressure on my brain
something i like to test
and an inclination to give the best
i know it all, and seldom get to rest
[c]
when your mind is hard at work
does your body get to play?
when the pills you take dont work
does it seem worth it to stay?
cause ive been through the miles
seen through disguises
and the city never lies,
so here is where i'll die.
[..c]
you dont know what i know
cause in the night, everything shows
you're see through like these shop windows
and still more miles to go
cant rest till i reach perfection, the goal
a figure in the dark, yeah, thats it
a superhero that cant save shit
thats me, jaded, evaded
by good memories worth savin'
a fuck up, a scum bag
a dash of luck and i end up as a cum rag
i shouldn't be here
hot wheels serve a better purpose
instead go get a happy meal
that's a better service
[c]
a little bitter? yeah, why not?
life is peachy, till your best friend gets caught
rollin' round in /your/ bed
tryin' to lie and claim he's /your/ friend
and a bitch tryin' to fake belief in trust
a victim of lust? fuck, you had a plan
conniving little cunt and i saw it, damn
but could say i'm mad? naw I thank you much
it's the same story for all of you
scars are just a lesson learned
so why waste my time with school?
like it, i learn from your actions, and both are a waste
and it hits quick, high, not confused, not preterbed
i somewhat welcome death, cause hell can't be worse
now your gone, i can't be happier
you've been replaced, couldn't have been any better
and out on the streets, i find my home
and i see memories, in the places i roam
if i dont make it back to that house
it's cause i got priorities,
sleep doesnt make the list
life is peachy, lovely, as long as i got these feet to move me
but i get greedy, my savior is going to kill me
[c]
The last the best [Jan 09]
..theres a little drummerboy
his name is ted
dont you know he travels with me
in it till the end
during the day, hes off doing
who knows what? with the who knows who?
for the who the fuck cares,, do you?
but you cant, noone does, lifes just that way
while the sun is shining there aint shit to be seen
the drugs, the "love", id all that in me?
but ted loves to get high, and fuck shit up, you see?
like lives,.. his to destroy, during teh day, he picks me
the sun, it fuels, the heat, his tool
and hes a master of the torture, its true
everything in the book, used on me and not you
and when hes drunk, he'll make you believe anything
and he'll punch and kick your ass, candy from a baby
but we can hope hell be sober soon, maybe
or maybe the night will fall, crash apon his head
and with some luck, ted will be dead
how he took a gun to his head...
and here's what he said
"i have yet to destroy the world
just left it to ruin, but dont you worry
ill be back, right when you start to rebuild, worried?"
bang, with the barbeque sauce on the pavement
and the power of the blast, the lasting impression of his intent
made his skull into a claymore, shrapnel ripping organs
heart, brain, lungs, but none of that important.
and then night fell, ted's body became distorted
a transformation to benefit a life or two
ted to fred, though he would look the same to you.
still a drummer boy, drummin' a phat beat
and how he travels in the night to avoid the heat
and hes resurrected with gifts
a cigar and some organization is what he brings
but it seems we take a stroll, to put good use of these things
this is the time he livs, welcoming the night cause it contrasts his
home, white and bright, high above, with a super, an asshole
but i got stories to welcome him here
the sexm the love, the lights, the rest
and when the rest will sleep, here, we make it the best
he'll learn in time, theres plenty around,
as we tear apart, the quet of the town
but just like his mentor, he keeps a gun around
and at the first sign of light, i shoot to kill
my life, before mister ted comes back
cause if i see him again, ill put a knife in his ass
but before i put to rest, the pressure on my temple
i hope you can catch the metaphors
some complex, less simple
so when you feel the bass hit, ill be gone
down for the count? ready for another round?
wake up in a lovely place, growing greater by the day
but dont get too happy, cause right before perfection
thats when a fuck up like ted, shows his ugly face,
come to destroy a perfect place,
he says "im here to destroy, im back at last"
my resonse to you, ho, is a shotgun blast.
fresh outa the cranium....typos and all....
his name is ted
dont you know he travels with me
in it till the end
during the day, hes off doing
who knows what? with the who knows who?
for the who the fuck cares,, do you?
but you cant, noone does, lifes just that way
while the sun is shining there aint shit to be seen
the drugs, the "love", id all that in me?
but ted loves to get high, and fuck shit up, you see?
like lives,.. his to destroy, during teh day, he picks me
the sun, it fuels, the heat, his tool
and hes a master of the torture, its true
everything in the book, used on me and not you
and when hes drunk, he'll make you believe anything
and he'll punch and kick your ass, candy from a baby
but we can hope hell be sober soon, maybe
or maybe the night will fall, crash apon his head
and with some luck, ted will be dead
how he took a gun to his head...
and here's what he said
"i have yet to destroy the world
just left it to ruin, but dont you worry
ill be back, right when you start to rebuild, worried?"
bang, with the barbeque sauce on the pavement
and the power of the blast, the lasting impression of his intent
made his skull into a claymore, shrapnel ripping organs
heart, brain, lungs, but none of that important.
and then night fell, ted's body became distorted
a transformation to benefit a life or two
ted to fred, though he would look the same to you.
still a drummer boy, drummin' a phat beat
and how he travels in the night to avoid the heat
and hes resurrected with gifts
a cigar and some organization is what he brings
but it seems we take a stroll, to put good use of these things
this is the time he livs, welcoming the night cause it contrasts his
home, white and bright, high above, with a super, an asshole
but i got stories to welcome him here
the sexm the love, the lights, the rest
and when the rest will sleep, here, we make it the best
he'll learn in time, theres plenty around,
as we tear apart, the quet of the town
but just like his mentor, he keeps a gun around
and at the first sign of light, i shoot to kill
my life, before mister ted comes back
cause if i see him again, ill put a knife in his ass
but before i put to rest, the pressure on my temple
i hope you can catch the metaphors
some complex, less simple
so when you feel the bass hit, ill be gone
down for the count? ready for another round?
wake up in a lovely place, growing greater by the day
but dont get too happy, cause right before perfection
thats when a fuck up like ted, shows his ugly face,
come to destroy a perfect place,
he says "im here to destroy, im back at last"
my resonse to you, ho, is a shotgun blast.
fresh outa the cranium....typos and all....
Without you, im just me JAN 09
lifes been a different story
dancing to a different tune.
the fun, nothing matters, times we had are gone
youre here, and youre anywhere
youre on my mind
all the time.
saying i will miss you
is such an understatement
i can wish your safe
i can wish your well
but i know the truth
and your gone forever.
you will always be with me
especially since your gone.
rest in peace.
you are not to be forgotten
you are not to be replaced.
dancing to a different tune.
the fun, nothing matters, times we had are gone
youre here, and youre anywhere
youre on my mind
all the time.
saying i will miss you
is such an understatement
i can wish your safe
i can wish your well
but i know the truth
and your gone forever.
you will always be with me
especially since your gone.
rest in peace.
you are not to be forgotten
you are not to be replaced.
Christmas is over Jan 09
Well its christmas time
a time to bring out the greed in the best of us
i am no immortal to the temptation
i have greed of my own
but while it is a greed for myself, it is my own
it is my special
a greed to want, what i want
but without expectation
but Santa, can you give me what i want?
I want a chance, I want a shot
I want to not screw up, I want a shot.
to show someone special, how her world should be
to show someone special, how she should be treated
to return the favor, given to me
to make her feel, how special she can be
not a selfish greed, for all i want is happiness
not for myself, but for another
take back what would be mine, give joy to another
forget the past, the future is what matters
so "nick",this is what i want
i want her to be happy
which i think i could do
i want to not screw up
like in the past i've shown to
i want her, she makes me happy
but does she want me too?
there is no bad feelings
if you do not bring me what i wanted
but you make have to make up for it,
you know i like Ducati's.
So what do i want? A bag of selfless greed.
I've not been a good boy, but i've had some good months.
Thats what i want, in simple
is it or is it not what i will get?
a time to bring out the greed in the best of us
i am no immortal to the temptation
i have greed of my own
but while it is a greed for myself, it is my own
it is my special
a greed to want, what i want
but without expectation
but Santa, can you give me what i want?
I want a chance, I want a shot
I want to not screw up, I want a shot.
to show someone special, how her world should be
to show someone special, how she should be treated
to return the favor, given to me
to make her feel, how special she can be
not a selfish greed, for all i want is happiness
not for myself, but for another
take back what would be mine, give joy to another
forget the past, the future is what matters
so "nick",this is what i want
i want her to be happy
which i think i could do
i want to not screw up
like in the past i've shown to
i want her, she makes me happy
but does she want me too?
there is no bad feelings
if you do not bring me what i wanted
but you make have to make up for it,
you know i like Ducati's.
So what do i want? A bag of selfless greed.
I've not been a good boy, but i've had some good months.
Thats what i want, in simple
is it or is it not what i will get?
GOd is mest DEC 08
im here to save the world
but im not a hero, im like the rest
for the positive of payback, to you
for your gift of life after death
If there was a part of me, to you, unknown
you would not be above me, to help me grow
im down to risk it all
im out to take the fall
and when i look up with black eyes
you are what i see
without you i could not break ties
without you, i would have missed the lies
to wake me up, to put the bottle down
i give you trust, you wont let me drown
oh i should drown
your forgiving place
faith in that face
dont hide in the shadows
in a life like gallows
take me up, take me up
to you, i give all i have
in hopes of you, to repeat my past
even the greatest memories dont last
the perfection, your form, unlike the rest
you make the universe jealous, for it longs
to be as good as you, crawling up
from tortured and bitter, to the happiest state
on the swing of karma, it was worth the wait
a seat in paradise, for party of 2
In the dreams, your image could replace
as if in home, it is your space
luck was never in my soul
but now im right, that is known
like a thief, you carry an item of mine
but given to you, with value, the largest
and for you, i carry a gun with one target
a bullet meant for that head, i am righteous
and ready for the kill, anywhere
and im ready to forever, wrestle the bear
but im not a hero, im like the rest
for the positive of payback, to you
for your gift of life after death
If there was a part of me, to you, unknown
you would not be above me, to help me grow
im down to risk it all
im out to take the fall
and when i look up with black eyes
you are what i see
without you i could not break ties
without you, i would have missed the lies
to wake me up, to put the bottle down
i give you trust, you wont let me drown
oh i should drown
your forgiving place
faith in that face
dont hide in the shadows
in a life like gallows
take me up, take me up
to you, i give all i have
in hopes of you, to repeat my past
even the greatest memories dont last
the perfection, your form, unlike the rest
you make the universe jealous, for it longs
to be as good as you, crawling up
from tortured and bitter, to the happiest state
on the swing of karma, it was worth the wait
a seat in paradise, for party of 2
In the dreams, your image could replace
as if in home, it is your space
luck was never in my soul
but now im right, that is known
like a thief, you carry an item of mine
but given to you, with value, the largest
and for you, i carry a gun with one target
a bullet meant for that head, i am righteous
and ready for the kill, anywhere
and im ready to forever, wrestle the bear
Get your holiday on DEC 08
Its christmas time
joy and hatred arise
mistletoe and fun lies
in hanukkah's prime
dradles and lays
the time of our lives
the prime of our lives
Now its a time to forgive and to care
but im sorry young lady, not enough time can pass
i know the answer, so i would never ask
but you had fun didnt you? but do you tell the truth?
how was i to know when i fell, bones had broken
is it called karma when he broke yours too?
and a message to smoochie, youll never be alone
i know you world crashed down, but i will never let you follow
though the others may be gone, like the stars i am here
and jA, we miss you, i hope your beliefs are right
you never did wrong, never asked for help
never took shit for granted, but you could make the night
and if a party was thrown, you were there to be seen
quite the inspiration, worked so hard,
now you got what you need 20, rest in piece,
[c]
50 weeks in hell, wandering through the desert of fire
an oasis in the distance, with a label mirage above it
closing in fast, as im losing my strength, i can see it in reach
paradise in hell, who know it exists?
so ill stay a few days, soak up some perfection
till the devil made me leave, to wander for progression
trippin on my feet i can only look back to save sane,
wondering if paradise can be two in a million
[c]
reflect on this time, is there a psychic inside?
for the 99, here it resides
but doctor, doctor, you saved my life.
ill repay you all i have
all that you will accept, till my ultimate demise
[c]
with a mistletoe ligature to take your breath away
that glorified tree our pedestal for this show
get ready for the drop, i hope you can fly
a noose so tight, there's not much time
invite the undertaker claus to host the day
mrs claus sent the angels to take you away
salvation in a bottle, see clear to the floor,
take me away, take me today
joy and hatred arise
mistletoe and fun lies
in hanukkah's prime
dradles and lays
the time of our lives
the prime of our lives
Now its a time to forgive and to care
but im sorry young lady, not enough time can pass
i know the answer, so i would never ask
but you had fun didnt you? but do you tell the truth?
how was i to know when i fell, bones had broken
is it called karma when he broke yours too?
and a message to smoochie, youll never be alone
i know you world crashed down, but i will never let you follow
though the others may be gone, like the stars i am here
and jA, we miss you, i hope your beliefs are right
you never did wrong, never asked for help
never took shit for granted, but you could make the night
and if a party was thrown, you were there to be seen
quite the inspiration, worked so hard,
now you got what you need 20, rest in piece,
[c]
50 weeks in hell, wandering through the desert of fire
an oasis in the distance, with a label mirage above it
closing in fast, as im losing my strength, i can see it in reach
paradise in hell, who know it exists?
so ill stay a few days, soak up some perfection
till the devil made me leave, to wander for progression
trippin on my feet i can only look back to save sane,
wondering if paradise can be two in a million
[c]
reflect on this time, is there a psychic inside?
for the 99, here it resides
but doctor, doctor, you saved my life.
ill repay you all i have
all that you will accept, till my ultimate demise
[c]
with a mistletoe ligature to take your breath away
that glorified tree our pedestal for this show
get ready for the drop, i hope you can fly
a noose so tight, there's not much time
invite the undertaker claus to host the day
mrs claus sent the angels to take you away
salvation in a bottle, see clear to the floor,
take me away, take me today
Do Break DEC 08
i never thought a mountain could move
i never thought so tight could loosen
i never thought a world could crumble
never dreamed the dead would rise.
i never thought perfection could be found
i never thought wishes could come true
i never thought the stories could be true
never imagined i would feel it too.
but i knew the party would end
and hidden away was the real one
too blind to see at first
but it found me like a gun
a gun to take my life
and if that time comes i will not fight
shot in the brain,
left to suffer
come back for the heart
so quick, i wonder
will i ever find that time to rest
will the stars ever align again
can we raise the dead once more?
let the time and space replace
that which is forgotten
drugs, gone, forget what you know
people, their stupid, it just goes to show.
but too the memories i have, before the break
the friends i love, one written on my heart,
the ones i hate, lost in my art.
cheers to all those memories, but i am afraid
the ones more recent, and those to the future,
will make me erase, those memories before the break.
i never thought so tight could loosen
i never thought a world could crumble
never dreamed the dead would rise.
i never thought perfection could be found
i never thought wishes could come true
i never thought the stories could be true
never imagined i would feel it too.
but i knew the party would end
and hidden away was the real one
too blind to see at first
but it found me like a gun
a gun to take my life
and if that time comes i will not fight
shot in the brain,
left to suffer
come back for the heart
so quick, i wonder
will i ever find that time to rest
will the stars ever align again
can we raise the dead once more?
let the time and space replace
that which is forgotten
drugs, gone, forget what you know
people, their stupid, it just goes to show.
but too the memories i have, before the break
the friends i love, one written on my heart,
the ones i hate, lost in my art.
cheers to all those memories, but i am afraid
the ones more recent, and those to the future,
will make me erase, those memories before the break.
Old Fashoin NOV 08
Do you remember,
when the guys had standards
and the girls had morals
do you remember
when you tossed your lies around
like yourself lying down
do you remember
all the lies you told
all the guys that filled your hole
was caring lost with your soul
Does the fuck
make you feel better when your down on your luck
and does it help
to know your burning out in a town thats falling down
your just another slut, and i cant bare to stand it
where will you find your next fuck, whose lies will you eat
while your down on your knees, searching for some meat
so stupid
so tasteless
your turning into them
so soon youll be faceless
you act like its alright
but i know what youve done
and im glad your set for a fall
you think that its alright
but im an elephant to your lies
Its come to destroy you
i know just what you want
just a little more humpin
and a fuck just for fun
you know where to get it
any given day
and youll believe any guy
no matter what they say
the past is just proof
cause you let them get their way
while on your back is where you lay!
when the guys had standards
and the girls had morals
do you remember
when you tossed your lies around
like yourself lying down
do you remember
all the lies you told
all the guys that filled your hole
was caring lost with your soul
Does the fuck
make you feel better when your down on your luck
and does it help
to know your burning out in a town thats falling down
your just another slut, and i cant bare to stand it
where will you find your next fuck, whose lies will you eat
while your down on your knees, searching for some meat
so stupid
so tasteless
your turning into them
so soon youll be faceless
you act like its alright
but i know what youve done
and im glad your set for a fall
you think that its alright
but im an elephant to your lies
Its come to destroy you
i know just what you want
just a little more humpin
and a fuck just for fun
you know where to get it
any given day
and youll believe any guy
no matter what they say
the past is just proof
cause you let them get their way
while on your back is where you lay!
Extinct Emotions Nov 08
to those who will listen
to the force of a thousand deaths
my voice is the weapon
and your soul is the target
a show and tell to prove to them all
hell is a place on earth
empathy, you will learn
this hollywood movie, low budget;
wont make you laugh, wont please the kids
but is worth millions, to all those that care to learn
prepare to be shocked, and dont be afraid to cry
we are all family now, change has come this time.
[c]
the protaganist, fucked up and full of pain
racing to save the world would show up just too late,
let it all fall, crash down so violently.
when love is red, and so are the walls,
the sky will fall, slow with agony.
can one live without a soul?
to go on when all is lost,
all to please others, selfless persistence.
promises buried deep, to be there always
dependence thats needed, they will never leave.
[c]
a shocking horror, so fucked up it cant be real
when life is hell, where do you go when you die
its hard to decide, when life itself is a lie
[c/]
our antagonist, hellbent to destroy it all
uses whatever means he can find to satisfy his overblown ego
universe centered on himself nothing else matters
self gratification; the motif for his actions.
blazing a path, taking out the necissary components
destroying the universe, since he cannot own it
a thick shell, the common will not do.
any alternative will suffice
it is chosen, irony is the device.
[c]
if time could turn back
the theme would be changed
suffering for the activist,
perfection for the witness
to the force of a thousand deaths
my voice is the weapon
and your soul is the target
a show and tell to prove to them all
hell is a place on earth
empathy, you will learn
this hollywood movie, low budget;
wont make you laugh, wont please the kids
but is worth millions, to all those that care to learn
prepare to be shocked, and dont be afraid to cry
we are all family now, change has come this time.
[c]
the protaganist, fucked up and full of pain
racing to save the world would show up just too late,
let it all fall, crash down so violently.
when love is red, and so are the walls,
the sky will fall, slow with agony.
can one live without a soul?
to go on when all is lost,
all to please others, selfless persistence.
promises buried deep, to be there always
dependence thats needed, they will never leave.
[c]
a shocking horror, so fucked up it cant be real
when life is hell, where do you go when you die
its hard to decide, when life itself is a lie
[c/]
our antagonist, hellbent to destroy it all
uses whatever means he can find to satisfy his overblown ego
universe centered on himself nothing else matters
self gratification; the motif for his actions.
blazing a path, taking out the necissary components
destroying the universe, since he cannot own it
a thick shell, the common will not do.
any alternative will suffice
it is chosen, irony is the device.
[c]
if time could turn back
the theme would be changed
suffering for the activist,
perfection for the witness
longest nights OCT 08
the sky was so bright
and the sea water lit with the moonlight
with many clouds in the sky
it gave the impression that the sky was to cry.
with nothing but a towel as our tool
the longest night is what we would produce
not too high but we flew away
we wont come back till a quarter to eight
we set the sand pn fire
i never knew burger king was open so late
the longest night is there to stay
till the next week you came at me with a .38
just a dollar short and a day late
thats in my job description
and for my life it will remain
i may have let you down,
but i know youll be just fine while you sleep with the town
you must love the beach boys
cause you get around
oh how god must hate the lies you forged
but could you do me one more favor, honey
tell my son his mommy's a whore?
right after you make up a name
or find where he hides
i know hes running from you
hiding in back of your eyes
and the sea water lit with the moonlight
with many clouds in the sky
it gave the impression that the sky was to cry.
with nothing but a towel as our tool
the longest night is what we would produce
not too high but we flew away
we wont come back till a quarter to eight
we set the sand pn fire
i never knew burger king was open so late
the longest night is there to stay
till the next week you came at me with a .38
just a dollar short and a day late
thats in my job description
and for my life it will remain
i may have let you down,
but i know youll be just fine while you sleep with the town
you must love the beach boys
cause you get around
oh how god must hate the lies you forged
but could you do me one more favor, honey
tell my son his mommy's a whore?
right after you make up a name
or find where he hides
i know hes running from you
hiding in back of your eyes
Ice on the outside
its not right
its all wrong
when you open your mouth
and hear someone elses voice
when the person in the mirror
is one you tear down to size
when the damage is too costly
you cant bare to watch
the train wreck,it crashes so slow
put yourself on the tracks
look at the damage to be done
live free
die in pain
i found the cure
so turn back the clock
erase my faults
erase my past
bring back my paradise
or pass me on, now
its all wrong
when you open your mouth
and hear someone elses voice
when the person in the mirror
is one you tear down to size
when the damage is too costly
you cant bare to watch
the train wreck,it crashes so slow
put yourself on the tracks
look at the damage to be done
live free
die in pain
i found the cure
so turn back the clock
erase my faults
erase my past
bring back my paradise
or pass me on, now
Uneasy Oct 08
been some time since ive had this gun to my head.
been some time since ive had these pills in my stomach.
why dont i miss either feeling?
when i pull that trigger
when i take that last pill
i will fade to happiness
and isnt that what we all want?
no matter what the price.
when life gets tough,
you make it better.
simplest rule of life.
and when the answer hits us.
we will realize we wasted our time
our precious, valuable time.
when will you realize?
youve been such a fool...
when will you get it?
you never thought as much as you felt,
think clearly, and all questions will be answered...
follow blind morals and beliefs,
your time will be wasted.
the answers are in front of your eyes...
the pursuit of happiness,
the meaning of life,
the cure for the disease,
so fight through the pain and answer your inquiries,
blow away the hurt to solve your problems.
my last bullet,
my last pill,
an inch out of reach,
wont you bring me salvation?
it could be yours too.
been some time since ive had these pills in my stomach.
why dont i miss either feeling?
when i pull that trigger
when i take that last pill
i will fade to happiness
and isnt that what we all want?
no matter what the price.
when life gets tough,
you make it better.
simplest rule of life.
and when the answer hits us.
we will realize we wasted our time
our precious, valuable time.
when will you realize?
youve been such a fool...
when will you get it?
you never thought as much as you felt,
think clearly, and all questions will be answered...
follow blind morals and beliefs,
your time will be wasted.
the answers are in front of your eyes...
the pursuit of happiness,
the meaning of life,
the cure for the disease,
so fight through the pain and answer your inquiries,
blow away the hurt to solve your problems.
my last bullet,
my last pill,
an inch out of reach,
wont you bring me salvation?
it could be yours too.
Met-a-phor...? [oct 08]
been some time since ive had this gun to my head.
been some time since ive had these pills in my stomach.
why dont i miss either feeling?
when i pull that trigger
when i take that last pill
i will fade to happiness
and isnt that what we all want?
no matter what the price.
when life gets tough,
you make it better.
simplest rule of life.
and when the answer hits us.
we will realize we wasted our time
our precious, valuable time.
when will you realize?
youve been such a fool...
when will you get it?
you never thought as much as you felt,
think clearly, and all questions will be answered...
follow blind morals and beliefs,
your time will be wasted.
the answers are in front of your eyes...
the pursuit of happiness,
the meaning of life,
the cure for the disease,
so fight through the pain and answer your inquiries,
blow away the hurt to solve your problems.
my last bullet,
my last pill,
an inch out of reach,
wont you bring me salvation?
it could be yours too.
been some time since ive had these pills in my stomach.
why dont i miss either feeling?
when i pull that trigger
when i take that last pill
i will fade to happiness
and isnt that what we all want?
no matter what the price.
when life gets tough,
you make it better.
simplest rule of life.
and when the answer hits us.
we will realize we wasted our time
our precious, valuable time.
when will you realize?
youve been such a fool...
when will you get it?
you never thought as much as you felt,
think clearly, and all questions will be answered...
follow blind morals and beliefs,
your time will be wasted.
the answers are in front of your eyes...
the pursuit of happiness,
the meaning of life,
the cure for the disease,
so fight through the pain and answer your inquiries,
blow away the hurt to solve your problems.
my last bullet,
my last pill,
an inch out of reach,
wont you bring me salvation?
it could be yours too.
Hiatus from my first love [Sep 08]
You have been with me since '96
since i arrived in this god forsaken place
you never failed to take my pain away
and give me more, that i never minded
you never failed to take my mind on a trip
and i never thought of my problems while i was with you
but now i can no longer keep this up
my physical being cannot take it anymore
so im throwing in the towel and wishing a farewell
this is not goodbye,
it is see you later
i will be back after i emerge from under that knife.
so your two wheels can rest for a while
i will see you in due time
since i arrived in this god forsaken place
you never failed to take my pain away
and give me more, that i never minded
you never failed to take my mind on a trip
and i never thought of my problems while i was with you
but now i can no longer keep this up
my physical being cannot take it anymore
so im throwing in the towel and wishing a farewell
this is not goodbye,
it is see you later
i will be back after i emerge from under that knife.
so your two wheels can rest for a while
i will see you in due time
Screaming [Sep 08]
with outstretched arms
and a voice so high
i scream to the sky
you are not real
this i can see
if you were there youd be helping me
i wouldnt live in this misery
i wouldnt have to worry
and i would not dream...
and a voice so high
i scream to the sky
you are not real
this i can see
if you were there youd be helping me
i wouldnt live in this misery
i wouldnt have to worry
and i would not dream...
Short and sweet.
not a day goes by
or a minute past my eye
that i dont want to fly
with you into the sky
you know its no lie
without you i would die
cuz i am your perfect guy
im staring at your thighs
nd like hips they dont lie
come to the crib thats mine
and ill show you where to ly
and take you on a ride
have you screaming to the sky
cuz when i look in to your eye
i hear no lies
and i feel those thighs
makes me feel the world is alright
cuz you are all mine
but only here when i lie
or a minute past my eye
that i dont want to fly
with you into the sky
you know its no lie
without you i would die
cuz i am your perfect guy
im staring at your thighs
nd like hips they dont lie
come to the crib thats mine
and ill show you where to ly
and take you on a ride
have you screaming to the sky
cuz when i look in to your eye
i hear no lies
and i feel those thighs
makes me feel the world is alright
cuz you are all mine
but only here when i lie
Grey Matter’z my color of choice [Sep 08]
[C]
oh, that problem
what could it be
i can tell you i see it
and it stares back at me
but im not afraid
and when i face it
i cannot breathe
but i see
i want it to be the end of me
[AC]
Im feeling happy tonight
i don't know why?
depression sets in and i want to die
but i found a way out
the most beautiful escape
a guaranteed way to make my problems go away
and i scream at the running star
-Let this feeling stay!-
i want to keep this solution
that makes the pain go away
stuck to my head, for now
my escape his here to stay
[C]
Cold as ice
soft as the sky
sometimes i think about the bang
here where i lie
but i want to bite my lip
and let the release fly
but there is a limit to what is to be said
though its as comfortable as a hat to my head
i got an itchy trigger finger
and its bound to blow
but i enjoy the time and linger
cause' maybe im not ready to go
put a bullet in my head, and do what you wish
but don't come out the other side, 'till your job is finished
[C]
The sadness in my head tells me its time to go
(Why do i feel this is a mistake?)
But i don't want it over yet so ill take it slow
(Why is this a chance i want to take?)
The silhouette of your face in the moonlight
just the image to kick start this night
and how id like to travel when the time is right
but we know you won't be with me on this perfect flight
So come on, come on, join me in this ride
and maybe, maybe, you can take the dive
away from the sand you hate
here is a chance you should take
in your hand you have a ticket out of town
and town won't be the same without you around.
while i recieve this hospital pass
with arms so high ready for the hit
It's just the pinch i need to say goodbye
I can't win this game, don't even try.
[C]
Begining to unhappy ending. [Sep 08]
i feel the need to build myself up
just to fall back down
and i only get up
to again hit the ground
if only i saw the real
and not hoping when its fake
i could see when its real
and not hate the chances i take
in a life without a single regret
i wonder what would be
if what i thought was real
i wonder where i would be
if everything wasn't a lie to me.
just to fall back down
and i only get up
to again hit the ground
if only i saw the real
and not hoping when its fake
i could see when its real
and not hate the chances i take
in a life without a single regret
i wonder what would be
if what i thought was real
i wonder where i would be
if everything wasn't a lie to me.
Sep 08 [no title]
You got a wonderful mind
and quite the imagination
puttin to work makin up lies daily
it doesnt take you long and you got the perfect alibi
but you could put that to good use, instead of steady lies
instead of makin up shit that will eventually get you wrecked
you could write some crazy stories that could sell the best
but instead you make up shit about the people you dont know
but leave out the fact that you were the one with that stupid hoe
talkin so much shit we should put a diaper on your face
and invite you to a party somewhere they cannot trace
so keep makin up that garbage
cuz im takin out the trash tonight
and quite the imagination
puttin to work makin up lies daily
it doesnt take you long and you got the perfect alibi
but you could put that to good use, instead of steady lies
instead of makin up shit that will eventually get you wrecked
you could write some crazy stories that could sell the best
but instead you make up shit about the people you dont know
but leave out the fact that you were the one with that stupid hoe
talkin so much shit we should put a diaper on your face
and invite you to a party somewhere they cannot trace
so keep makin up that garbage
cuz im takin out the trash tonight
death by euthanasia [Aug 08]
so you think its strange
how i go to sleep with my shoes on
or when we made love
i would keep my hat on
suspicious with reason
i know now that your gone
the monkeys out of the bottle
you werent as sneaky as you thought, and
your fake bitch
cant hide behind your lies
and dont be shocked
when a bullet gets in your way
hits you like a ton of bricks
dont be surprised, when theres no tears shed
as you die
how i go to sleep with my shoes on
or when we made love
i would keep my hat on
suspicious with reason
i know now that your gone
the monkeys out of the bottle
you werent as sneaky as you thought, and
your fake bitch
cant hide behind your lies
and dont be shocked
when a bullet gets in your way
hits you like a ton of bricks
dont be surprised, when theres no tears shed
as you die
Love me gently with a chainsaw 08
i want to scream at the night
and think back to that perfect day
and remove my organs before they were effected
leave my eyes and my brain
to experience the euphoria
take out the breakable parts
and think back to that perfect day
and remove my organs before they were effected
leave my eyes and my brain
to experience the euphoria
take out the breakable parts
August 08
you know why i feel sad?/cuz theres a gun to my head/and the perp wants a ransom/he can never ever get/he had the last bar of gold to be owned/and traded it away for some torquise stones/and a portait of a man he had to keep in his head/it can never come out or ever be used/for fear that the power would be abused/tricked by the devil/he has taken me for ransom/he wants the picture out/he wants it so plastic/attached to his person so it was not to be forgotten/and that bar of gold/not lost but stolen/tto take to his grave like a new age pharoh/swindled by the devil/he lost the worlds only gold/and he gained a curse infecting his soul/but the beast threw in some free physical pain/a disease that eats from the inside out/infested in his chest/like maggots chewing about/he will die painfully at best/and now hes got a gun to my head/to ensure his pain in felt by the rest
Monday, June 29, 2009
Wont get the best of mine [July 08]
just like that, anger turned to crazyness.
someone else is now fit to tell me whats wrong with MY mind.
someone else can tell what is troubling ME.
some old ass man who has no idea who i am, thinks he knows what the problem is.
just like that, he says its the solution.
he thinks MORE medication will help
just like that ive got more pills than the pharmacy
just like that.......these happy pills dont fucking work.
and just like that...that anger problem is still there.
and as a result of that.. theres a bullet in the chamber.
someone else is now fit to tell me whats wrong with MY mind.
someone else can tell what is troubling ME.
some old ass man who has no idea who i am, thinks he knows what the problem is.
just like that, he says its the solution.
he thinks MORE medication will help
just like that ive got more pills than the pharmacy
just like that.......these happy pills dont fucking work.
and just like that...that anger problem is still there.
and as a result of that.. theres a bullet in the chamber.
Face flat on the floor [june 18 08]
face down on a hotel room floor.
a lovely lady calling me from by the window
i cant feel my legs to get up an move
only to call out in a blank way
i hear the rain on the window
its a lovely ohio night
and im thinking
thinking why the human body has 2 minds
that one in the skull and the more important in the chest
the one up top has memories of the night
but the one down below has memories of that month
your always in my heart.
the stereo blasts my favorite songs
and the lyrics all spell your name
"yesterdays not all that bad
sorry i could not make this last"
i feel this time will be the last
you escaped my mind
and oh how its for the best
it seems your now like the rest
lost interest, stopped caring.
it shows in the halted communication
so now your outa my mind
my escape finally worked
youll be back....i know i wont.
everytime i hear a song.
every lyric i sing
they all have a little piece of you
i never thought this would ever happen.
any of it
but here i lie
face down on the floor
listening to the stereo blare
and the rain pour out there
and the lovely lady sleeps
your place in my mind has been filled
but it will be open again soon
thats just the way it goes
a lovely lady calling me from by the window
i cant feel my legs to get up an move
only to call out in a blank way
i hear the rain on the window
its a lovely ohio night
and im thinking
thinking why the human body has 2 minds
that one in the skull and the more important in the chest
the one up top has memories of the night
but the one down below has memories of that month
your always in my heart.
the stereo blasts my favorite songs
and the lyrics all spell your name
"yesterdays not all that bad
sorry i could not make this last"
i feel this time will be the last
you escaped my mind
and oh how its for the best
it seems your now like the rest
lost interest, stopped caring.
it shows in the halted communication
so now your outa my mind
my escape finally worked
youll be back....i know i wont.
everytime i hear a song.
every lyric i sing
they all have a little piece of you
i never thought this would ever happen.
any of it
but here i lie
face down on the floor
listening to the stereo blare
and the rain pour out there
and the lovely lady sleeps
your place in my mind has been filled
but it will be open again soon
thats just the way it goes
No Title; abouuttt june 08
hey guess what
heres another one
first of the last
but you dont care
and thats just fine
this isnt all this is just one side
just remember that and dont hold on to these words i write
ive had a lot on my mind
these last 10 days
and as the world around me falls
thats whats been on my brain
the way it all happened
the way that it fell
the question i didnt ask you
the story you failed to tell
i think you should know
that i am not right
for you, i have failed
but my mind it does stay
stuck on that day
the story you failed to say
though it sticks in my mind
i take my escape
i know you hate me
and at last you should know
how fucking pissed that i am
not about that fact
but the words you kept inside
and the question i let slide.
heres another one
first of the last
but you dont care
and thats just fine
this isnt all this is just one side
just remember that and dont hold on to these words i write
ive had a lot on my mind
these last 10 days
and as the world around me falls
thats whats been on my brain
the way it all happened
the way that it fell
the question i didnt ask you
the story you failed to tell
i think you should know
that i am not right
for you, i have failed
but my mind it does stay
stuck on that day
the story you failed to say
though it sticks in my mind
i take my escape
i know you hate me
and at last you should know
how fucking pissed that i am
not about that fact
but the words you kept inside
and the question i let slide.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Good news from the frontlines, we're unstoppable
im better than you could ever be,
i could take what you got.
but respect is a part of me,
though for you it is not.
you got dealt a good hand.
exchanged to make it worse
now look where you're trying to land
soon you will be at your worst.
Up here the view is nice.
i can see you being destroyed, its quite the sight
you did it to yourself, not sympathetic for you
you should leave now, its looking so pathetic
you, like the norm, believe what you are told
most disgusting type of person. that much has been shown.
[
i could take what you got.
but respect is a part of me,
though for you it is not.
you got dealt a good hand.
exchanged to make it worse
now look where you're trying to land
soon you will be at your worst.
Up here the view is nice.
i can see you being destroyed, its quite the sight
you did it to yourself, not sympathetic for you
you should leave now, its looking so pathetic
you, like the norm, believe what you are told
most disgusting type of person. that much has been shown.
[
Monday, June 22, 2009
Ink. 06x22x09
In a many years, will you still be impressed?
i tried to push hard, but thought i was all out of ink
because the stamp never showed, and i would sink.
hope, however, was imprinted in my acid
though i gave and gave the gift was never lifted
if you think of me years from now will you still be impressed?
or will i lose and be forgotten like the rest?
i tried to write a song just for you, every time i think
but it seems i tried to hard, my pen ran out of ink.
i try so hard to give back what you give me
will you still be able to tolerate my company?
does it bring a smile to your face when you think?
like the elation on mine when i envision your ink
forever isnt near long enough to press on my stamp
and theres not enough room in my pump for the words from my cap.
i hope for it to stay the same, what you deserve pushed to the brink
stay right next to me, 'cause you will be forever in my ink.
i tried to push hard, but thought i was all out of ink
because the stamp never showed, and i would sink.
hope, however, was imprinted in my acid
though i gave and gave the gift was never lifted
if you think of me years from now will you still be impressed?
or will i lose and be forgotten like the rest?
i tried to write a song just for you, every time i think
but it seems i tried to hard, my pen ran out of ink.
i try so hard to give back what you give me
will you still be able to tolerate my company?
does it bring a smile to your face when you think?
like the elation on mine when i envision your ink
forever isnt near long enough to press on my stamp
and theres not enough room in my pump for the words from my cap.
i hope for it to stay the same, what you deserve pushed to the brink
stay right next to me, 'cause you will be forever in my ink.
My heart sings/
...When i accomplish something, and it goes how i want it to. When i create something for someone and they genuinely enjoy it. When no matter how long it took, i completed a project for someone i care about. When i have a big enough impression to possibly last forever..
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Change! [Circa May '08]
it has been kept away for quite some time,
hidden in my mind and released at this time
i could think of a million ways to say
the very way i feel about you today
i hate you, thats just they way it goes
i hate what you've become
and what you remain to be
i hate your fuck ups
you know how much they hurt me
i miss the way that you used to be
i know your a failure you can't be right
it seems now days there's no happiness in sight
you are crazy for letting yourself get this way
you stress over stupid shit, the pain won't stay
you know i know your dead inside
you can't find happiness to make the pain subside
im sure there is no joy in your world
only false smiles you manage to push out
they don't last, they are overcome by disease
i wish i could help and end your misery
pull the trigger, say goodbye, save you peacefully
but i need you to stay
im nothing without you
im lost and forgotten
because your the only one who truely knows me
i want you to stay, you have so much to teach me
but i want you to change to they way you used to be
but sometimes people just never change
thats the way they are ment to be
but i know thats not you
i know you too well
you just need that ticket to happiness
the ticket i try to provide
but this gift, your too gone to take
but now i hear you took a shot
a hit real big like kryptonite
and its said to have changed you that night
we will see if it sticks
and we know who to thank for the help
a man named chris dealing out medicine to help you change
i hope it sticks
because you know i love you
the person you were
the person i hope your running back to be
return to that form, its the best idea
because if you don't try to change
it could cost you your life./
hidden in my mind and released at this time
i could think of a million ways to say
the very way i feel about you today
i hate you, thats just they way it goes
i hate what you've become
and what you remain to be
i hate your fuck ups
you know how much they hurt me
i miss the way that you used to be
i know your a failure you can't be right
it seems now days there's no happiness in sight
you are crazy for letting yourself get this way
you stress over stupid shit, the pain won't stay
you know i know your dead inside
you can't find happiness to make the pain subside
im sure there is no joy in your world
only false smiles you manage to push out
they don't last, they are overcome by disease
i wish i could help and end your misery
pull the trigger, say goodbye, save you peacefully
but i need you to stay
im nothing without you
im lost and forgotten
because your the only one who truely knows me
i want you to stay, you have so much to teach me
but i want you to change to they way you used to be
but sometimes people just never change
thats the way they are ment to be
but i know thats not you
i know you too well
you just need that ticket to happiness
the ticket i try to provide
but this gift, your too gone to take
but now i hear you took a shot
a hit real big like kryptonite
and its said to have changed you that night
we will see if it sticks
and we know who to thank for the help
a man named chris dealing out medicine to help you change
i hope it sticks
because you know i love you
the person you were
the person i hope your running back to be
return to that form, its the best idea
because if you don't try to change
it could cost you your life./
Saturday, June 20, 2009
C'est La Vie [Circa Summer '07]
Dear you,
remember the good time we used to have
remember the fights we never had
vocal chords saved by perfect hate
it was all the bliss we could take
walking through the liqour puddles
dropped along this life road
take me back to where we were
sang you a song, forgot the words
endless nights that ended too fast
devot myself to make it last
sweet busy worker bee
i still swear to treat you like a queen
on hiatus from the happyness in life
transpired from that day nine-twenty-five
i found what was never lost
the last peice of my puzzle
solution to my problem
saver of my sanity
.
Sincerly
I remember all the night rides to clear my head
all the things that coulda, shoulda, woulda been
let the random songs play loud now
and every one bring the worst of you out
my mind works like a factory
i want you to know that you will get the best of me
all the fuck ups i used to have
questioned if this would even last
a match made on that day
elated that you chose to stay
want to make this the best time of your life
return the happyness you gave to me
remember the good time we used to have
remember the fights we never had
vocal chords saved by perfect hate
it was all the bliss we could take
walking through the liqour puddles
dropped along this life road
take me back to where we were
sang you a song, forgot the words
endless nights that ended too fast
devot myself to make it last
sweet busy worker bee
i still swear to treat you like a queen
on hiatus from the happyness in life
transpired from that day nine-twenty-five
i found what was never lost
the last peice of my puzzle
solution to my problem
saver of my sanity
.
Sincerly
I remember all the night rides to clear my head
all the things that coulda, shoulda, woulda been
let the random songs play loud now
and every one bring the worst of you out
my mind works like a factory
i want you to know that you will get the best of me
all the fuck ups i used to have
questioned if this would even last
a match made on that day
elated that you chose to stay
want to make this the best time of your life
return the happyness you gave to me
Friday, June 19, 2009
Here it is.
My art blog. Writings mainly, but drawings and tattoos too. Hope you like and check back often and check out my sponsor ads, they're rad/
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